I Think I’ll Patent My Life Story

Published on November 8th, 2005

It’s a Mad, Mad, IP World
The U.S. Patent and Trademark Office was to publish the world’s first “storyline patent” application yesterday.

According to Georgetown University law professor Jay Thomas, “The case law of the Court of Appeals for the Federal Circuit has established that virtually any subject matter is potentially patentable,” and Andrew Knight extols the idea in an article for the Journal of the Patent and Trademark Office Society.

“Every year thousands of potentially patentable plots enter the public domain entirely unprotected,” says Knight on his Web page.

But fear not because, “Knight and Associates consists of Andrew Knight and a team of independent contractors comprising skilled writers and experienced patent attorneys, ready to turn valuable new fictional plots or storylines into U.S. utility patent applications.”

P2pnet’s Alex H. said, “This is perhaps the most reprehensible attempt by an individual to create a job for themselves. Simply create ‘property’ where none existed before, then charge big media companies to look after the chaotic legal issues you’ve created for them.

15 users responded in " I Think I’ll Patent My Life Story "

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# 1 Imafish said, on November 8th, 2005 at 5:33 pm

Speaking of asinine patents, Sony has a whopper: “A device and method for protection of legitimate software against USED software and counterfeit software in recording media.” Emphasis added.

Basically, Sony is about to kill off the used software/content markets. No more renting games folks. You guy or you don’t play.

http://www.joystiq.com/entry/1234000420067137/

# 2 Sounds the Alarm said, on November 8th, 2005 at 8:28 pm

Didn’t some jackass try to patent someone else’s DNA a few years back? If someone has the story – I can’t find it.

# 3 AB CD said, on November 8th, 2005 at 8:34 pm

Patents don’t last as long as copyrights, so what’s the point?

# 4 Alan said, on November 8th, 2005 at 9:48 pm

Bah, if there really are only 7 basic plots, then they are all in the public domain so they can go squat…

# 5 mike cannali said, on November 9th, 2005 at 1:40 am

Adding to AB CD’s comment
Patents are much more difficult to enforce than copyrights. Copyright Plagerism is simply a test of the degree of identity.

While patents are technically assumed vadid on their face once granted, effective enforcement of infringement can often occur only after the patent has been challenged in court.

Further – Copyrights are effective immediately upon asserting the right, where patents are often years in process and are often not granted until after a given concept may have become obsolete in the marketplace.

# 6 mike cannali said, on November 9th, 2005 at 1:48 am

However, if anything can be patented, I’d like to file a method patent on sex.
Opps-too much prior art.

# 7 Ima Fish said, on November 9th, 2005 at 6:14 am

Alan, you said there are 7 basic plots. I heard there are three. Man against nature. Nature against Man. Man against man. What are the remaning four?!

# 8 Dave Drews said, on November 9th, 2005 at 6:47 am

From http://eyeshot.net/learyplots1.html

1. Man v (Wo)man
2. Man v Nature
3. Man v Environment
4. Man v Machine
5. Man v The Supernatural
6. Man v Self
7. Man v God

# 9 Dave Drews said, on November 9th, 2005 at 6:55 am

A long time ago, as a long time reader of science fiction, I ran across a list of the seven basic themes in science fiction. Can’t remember who came up with it based on analyzing stories over decades, but I found this list in the Wikipedia using HG Wells’ stories as examples:

* Biological changes in humans or animals (The Island of Dr. Moreau).
* Time travel (The Time Machine).
* Humans with extraordinarly powers (The Invisible Man)
* Contact with aliens from other worlds (War of the Worlds)
* Space travel (The First Men in the Moon)
* The future (When the Sleeper Wakes)
* The evolution of the human race (Men Like Gods)

Some of these provide such profoundly different situations than any “normal” story deals with that a case could probably be made for having to add to the list of seven basic plots to account for them.

# 10 Ima Fish said, on November 9th, 2005 at 7:36 am

1. Man v (Wo)man 6. Man v Self are the same.

7. Man v God 5. Man v The Supernatural 3. Man v Environment 2. Man v Nature are all the same.

4. Man v Machine could fit in with either the former or the latter depending on who built the machine. If man built it, it’d be man against man. If an Alien built it, it’d be man against nature.

I guess there are only two.

# 11 N. Eric Phillips said, on November 9th, 2005 at 9:24 am

This is nuts. I have written a screenplay and am in the midst of making a low-budget film of it. Am I risking everything because some big company may have patents on similar plots? I don’t have money to fight a protracted legal battle. I thought the constitution is supposed to protect the free speech of everyone- not just the corps.

BTW: it talks about protecting “The Matrix” from someone doing a similar plot. I guess they never saw “Dark City” a year before. Same plot! And Star Wars: same plot. Reluctant hero who doesn’t know his destiny is pulled into a situation where he learns the truth of the world/universe around him and accepts his destiny while learning a cryptic supernatural power with which to fight the antagonists.

Last question: Doesn’t 5000 years of fiction writing mean anything in the phrase “prior art?”

# 12 Mike Voice said, on November 9th, 2005 at 9:31 am

…a team of independent contractors comprising skilled writers and experienced patent attorneys…

With the actual writers in a “work for hire” system – hence the “independent contractor” euphemism – so the copywrite for the storylines they write do not belong to the writers themselves.

Nice.

No salaries or benefits to pay, contracting-out to the lowest bidder (it doesn’t have to be a compelling story), and the potential for lots of money from licensing-fees (just to avoid any hassles) or out-of-court settlements.

I should patent his business plan, and charge him a franchise-fee to use it.

# 13 Don said, on November 9th, 2005 at 12:04 pm

Man v. Man & Man v. Self aren’t the same. A battle I have with an external adversary would be quite different than a battle I have with my own conscience. I heard them as Man v. Man & Man v. Inner Man, which seems a better distinction.

# 14 Ima Fish said, on November 9th, 2005 at 1:35 pm

They’re both still men, thus it’s man v man. If you think otherwise, whoopdie doo!

# 15 Pat said, on November 9th, 2005 at 4:06 pm

Man v Man v Nature v God v Machine…

Sheeshe !!!

Whatever happened to just a good story? Who cares about the minutia of different plots? Any good story will hold the reader’s interest until the end of the story, no matter how many times the same plot has been read before. Agatha Christie, among many many others, did this over and over and still managed to be recognized as a great writer.

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