Fateh Mohammad, a prison inmate in Pakistan, says he woke up last weekend with a glass lightbulb in his anus.

Wednesday night, doctors brought Mohammad’s misery to an end after a one-and-a-half hour operation to remove the object.

“Thanks Allah, now I feel comfort. Today, I had my breakfast. I was just drinking water, nothing else,” Mohammad, a grey-beared man in his mid-40s, told Reuters from a hospital bed in the southern central city of Multan.

Mohammad, who is serving a four-year sentence for making liquor, prohibited for Muslims, said he was shocked when he was first told the cause of his discomfort. He swears he didn’t know the bulb was there.

“When I woke up I felt a pain in my lower abdomen, but later in hospital, they told me this,” Mohammad said.

No comment. Really.

  1. Mr. H. Fusion says:

    Contrary to the obvious, putting a light bulb up your butt isn’t too bright. That is what gerbils are for.

  2. name says:

    Oh Mr. H Fusion… you are the end…

  3. ArianeB says:

    So how many doctors does it take to change a lightbulb?

  4. Lou says:

    If a light bulb over your head symbolizes a good idea…..

  5. Les says:

    “I dont know how it got there, just get it out!”

  6. John Wofford says:

    Prison life affords sufficient spare time to practice extreme meditation and reach the nirvana stage where one can levitate. Mohammed simply inverted while levitating and drifted up and enveloped the single bare lightbulb that is the basic decore of Indian prison cells. It must surely have been off during the enveloping as the stench of burning flesh would have broken the spell causing Mohammed to fall head first to the floor, and his diagnosis/prognosis would have been different.

  7. Gary Marks says:

    Let us worship the holy miracle ass-bulb.

  8. topcad says:

    I hear the doctor did a lower G.E.

  9. ECA says:

    chucka BOOM,
    SIT ON IT…

  10. James Hill says:

    Guess we have to teach them how to flip the switch, too.

  11. Jamel says:

    Foreplay with a light bulb HAHAH!!

  12. That would be funny if it the light was on!!!!.
    Somehow it dosn’t surprise me that Fateh Mohammad has a bulb in his a$$…One good fart and its all over…
    All kidding aside,I wounder what this bright A$$ was eating.
    One last question, Was it a gas bulb, Electric bulb or tulip Bulb and was he able to screw on a light with it?
    Well after he does his time he can come to New York and drive a cab or work in the local candy store or better yet find a job changing ………..you guessed it Light bulbs…………………….Another dvorak exclusive

  13. ECA says:

    I wonder if he has seen the LIGHT??

  14. How could he the light was in his A$$

    Good one;-)

  15. This guy Fateh Mohammad, looks like he saw 4th of July fireworks in every color.

    That bulb must have been shoved so far up his A$$ that his liver was seeing the light….

    I have a feeling his roomates are going to shove some sparklers in his butt when he returns.

  16. He Screamed my Electric bill is too high take the bulb out!

    And his roomate bubba said but your the light of my life.

  17. Now Fateh Mohammad feels much more comfortable
    he is on a light and lively diet just drinking water, relaxing in his pj’s and nothing else,

  18. ECA says:

    Maybe he used it as a book lite.
    Insentive to learn Yoga.


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