If McCain lives long enough to be elected, the old coot will be the oldest president ever to take his first oath of office. There are countless interviews with him where he appears to be confused, could it be dementia? (This certainly couldn’t be an early stage of dementia, because the guy is too old for that!)

And the old fogey cannot even use a computer. I never understood how the generation that got us to the moon can’t even set a clock on a VCR… and yet we’re going to trust this old-tard with the button?!

And some clever dude, probably young and full of life, created a website informing us of all the really old things that are still younger than McCain. For example, chocolate cookies, lubricated condoms, and nachos are all younger than McCain. Do you remember a time before any of those things? I certainly don’t. But I’m not a worthless old drain on our medical and social security systems, like McCain is.

Heck, even fellow old fart Chuck Norris thinks McCain is too old! Is electing a feeble-minded, frail, doddering, sputtering and drooling wrinkle-bag worth a round-house kick to the head? Not for me. I’m too young to die from Chuck’s feet of fury! (Or should I say furry feet? Old farts are so grotesquely hairy!)

Now I’m not saying that old “people” should be rounded up and euthanized. But, wouldn’t a peaceful death be better than selfishly continuing to live while wasting away our country’s precious resources? They’ve had their future, they should stop squandering ours!

So what do you guys and girls think? Is McCain too old to lead our country?

— Steve Newlin, Sr. Contributing Editor


  1. Akyan says:

    Say it with me everyone:


    However, I agree.

  2. bobbo says:

    Of course he is too old. The VP is the safety alternative but they are chosen on some loose analysis of the ability to get the candidate elected==not on the ability to be the President. My proof?–Dan Quale.

    Why our Founding Fathers stumbled on this I don’t know. Airline Pilots have age restrictions for public safety reasons even thought there are completely qualified co-pilots. Thats because when a plane goes down, upwards of 400-500 peoples lives can be affected. How many lives does a senile president affect?

    I recall the clip of Reagan’s last few years in office. He is asked a question but Nancy whispers the answer which he parrots exactly. Thats not the way to run the Imperial Presidency of the USA.

    Make the Max age to run for President same as the Airlines.==65?–whatever.

  3. Dc says:

    It won’t make a difference. His age or his insanity, which is more the vice?

    Of course, with this seasons crop of candidates, they all suck. The other is just younger and may actually have a chance to engage his ideas, as opposed to McCain who has to have people provide him his ideas.

  4. Mr. Gawd Almighty says:

    I hate to discriminate on age, but, … If he had of gone on to become President eight years ago, today we would be wondering how demented he is.

    McBush is just too far off in his views alone to be elected President.

  5. danijel says:

    Was pope John Paul II too old to lead the Vatican?
    That’s why he has aides.

    I think there are more important reasons why he shouldn’t be the president…

  6. RBG says:

    ,,,As opposed to a no-experience youngster just out of diapers.


  7. Billy Bob says:

    Wow, it’s writing like that that gets you the title of “Sr.” Contributing Editor.

  8. zeph says:

    What is this, Logan’s Run? SN, you’ve got issues.

    I’m not worried about McCain’s age. It’s enough that he’s creepy.

  9. SN says:

    8. “What is this, Logan’s Run? SN, you’ve got issues.”

    Thanks! Loved the movie, except that the bad guys won. Check out this great Logan’s Run site here.

  10. Jägermeister says:

    #5 – danijel – Was pope John Paul II too old to lead the Vatican?

    He wasn’t elected by the public, but by a bunch of other old people.

    That’s why he has aides.

    You elect a person not for his aides, but for his/her ideas and competency… at least that’s the idea.

  11. Awake says:

    Pope John Paul II was 58 years old when he became pope, so I don’t see how the pope’s age can be used as a valid comparison to McCain.
    Aside from the fact that their ‘political’ roles are very different (dictator -vs- national leader) By the time that the pope reached McCain’s current age, his health and mental condition had significantly deteriorated, to the point that he would not have been elected pope. Just a couple of years later there was deep debate about the pope having to ‘quit’ due to health reasons and the needs of the church.

    McCain reminds me a lot of my own grandfather… a respected, healthy individual who quickly started to deteriorate mentally in his mid-70’s. He could not learn new things, talked a lot about ‘the good old days’, became increasingly ornery, and stated to think that the government was out to get him.

  12. Shenzhov says:

    You are an idiot right? Lets just throw away people. Ok Mr. Logan’s Run, at what age do we need to start sending people to the disintegration chambers? How about we take your age and back up one year? Oh, not as good an idea now is it?

    I know some people in the 10th grade that think you are too old to use the internet, so why don’t you shut up with this crap.

    “But, wouldn’t a peaceful death be better than selfishly continuing to live while wasting away our country’s precious resources?”

    I hope John C. is smart enough to kick you off this blog and never let you back.

    As far as McCain goes, it’s not my job to determine his mental health, but I think we have determined yours.

    [Does the expression “tongue in cheek” mean anything to you? – ed.]

  13. gregallen says:

    Disqualified because of age? No.

    Disqualified because of age-related decline in mental performance? Yes. (If true.)

  14. Don says:

    Obama is going to make McCain look like Admiral Stockdale.

    I just hope Obama is not stupid enough to pick Hillary as his copresident.


  15. SN says:

    12. “You are an idiot right?”

    Yes I am. You can read more about being an idiot here. Thanks for reading!

  16. woiwn says:

    Last time I checked, you cannot vote via Twitter, Facebook, or MySpace. In fact, that demographic tends to be non-voters. People who are the most passionate votes are probably in closer to McCain’s age. As far as competence is concerned, GW has shown that the issue is irrelevant. All you have to do is create fear by invoking the term terrorist AND claim that you are a devote follower of a mainstream religion. I expect McCain to follow the same tactic, while trying to convince the public that Obama is weak on both points.

  17. zeph says:

    Mmm hmm. Attempt at humor noted. Keep your day job.

  18. SN says:

    16. “Mmm hmm. Attempt at humor noted. Keep your day job.”

    No problem. I realize that the ability to recognize satire is a higher brain function that not all primates have. I tried to make it as obvious and over the top as possible, but I can only reach so low.

  19. qsabe says:

    He’s younger than I am. .. Maybe old to you guys who find fault with Clinton’s BJ, yet weren’t old enough to earn your own living during his time. .. He has a wife with big tits and a brewery. What do you smart asses find around to compete with those superb qualifications?

  20. QB says:

    Shenzhov said: “As far as McCain goes, it’s not my job to determine his mental health…”

    Actually, as a voter, it is your job.

  21. Grandpa says:

    Saying McCain is too old is like saying Obama is too black. His stand on the issues is EXACTLY that of the current idiot. That should be enough to scare anybody away.

  22. bobbo says:

    SN–well, now I’m confused. ((I guess I shouldn’t run for president?))

    Within the OP, I only see two sentences of Swiftian motif near the end: “But, wouldn’t a peaceful death be better than selfishly continuing to live while wasting away our country’s precious resources? They’ve had their future, they should stop squandering ours.” ((That last sentence is VERY well done-kudo’s.))

    Age limitations on office are job related supported by an increasing frequency of all the particular items you noted. You denied the plot line of Logan’s Run expressly in saying McSame should not be euthanized.

    Not all harsh applications of logic and sound social policy is satire. If there is a limit on youth, one for age seems just as valid for the same type of generalization.

    So, if this is satire, I take it then that you think the Office of President should not be denied by being too old.

    How about too young. Hanna Montanna?

  23. SN says:

    “So, if this is satire, I take it then that you think the Office of President should not be denied by being too old.”

    I’m just making some social commentary on the notion that McCain is too old. As Greg Allen said:

    Disqualified because of age? No.

    Disqualified because of age-related decline in mental performance? Yes.

    Regardless of McCain’s age, I personally think he’s wacko.

  24. igor says:

    Was text altered before i got here or did everyone really take it THAT seriously?

  25. Usagi says:

    He may not be too old but he may be too senile.

    Is Lieberman gonna whisper in his ear for 4 years?

    The scary part is people see his mental condition and still want to vote for him. These are the ones we need to limit!

  26. Mister Mustard says:

    >>,,,As opposed to a no-experience
    >>youngster just out of diapers.

    Maybe in your culture people don’t get out of diapers until their 40’s, RGB, but normal people learn to control their bowels and urination at a much earlier age.

    And Obama is plenty old enough to lead the nation.

    I’m not sure about McBush’s mental status wrt his age, but based on the tenets of his platform, I’d say he’s ruled out. We’ve been through 8 years of that shit. Didn’t work then, won’t work now.

    He’s irrelevant.

  27. B. Dog says:

    If you have forgotten about wise old wizards, take a day off and have a Lord of the Rings festival for your friends and family.

    The trouble is, McCain ain’t no wizard. On top of that, he doesn’t seem to really give a flying fuck about anybody else. I think his big dream is to be the guy who pushed the button to start Armageddon.

  28. bobbo says:

    Huff Post has a scathing review of McSame:


    Kinda funny as a result. Good links backing up the negative assessment.

  29. it's just an expression says:

    McCain will win, so save your petty energy for your important endeavors of nit-picking for the next four years after, or better yet, do something to actually help the country, and yourself, instead of criticizing a man of integrity and wisdom and age, who is on his way to lead the nation, as he has already proven his ability, and it’s the old people like him who will get him into office, and remember what you said and how you acted when you get to his age, if you manage to make it there.

  30. RCopeh says:

    Here’s the rules; if he doesn’t get the votes in then he shouldn’t be president. If he does, then he should. That’s ‘d-e-m-o-c-r-a-c-y’. The people decide, not a bunch of know-it-all web users who think that ‘stupid people’ aren’t smart enough to vote.

    What kind of human being wants to say “Nah, you can’t run for president because I don’t like you. I don’t give a sh*t if other people like you, *I* don’t like you and neither do my ‘cleverer than you’ internet buddies so no, you can’t run for president”?

    Maybe someone should devise a ‘fogey-o-meter’ so that we can measure someone’s ‘fogeynitude’ and if they’re not to much of a ‘fogey’ they can run? Of course, we can’t trust ‘the people’ to decide if he’s a fogey, so I guess we’ll be knocking on your door again, just for advice.

    “Should an old out of touch fogey like McCain be allowed the Presidency?”

    Here’s a better question; Should a stupid, narrow-minded and self-opinionated moron be allowed to edit a website?

    Anyway, I always thought that any American could be president. You want to change the rules to suit you?


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