Caption this Knife Photo

Published on December 20th, 2008

Posted by hhopper in humor

(Click photo to enlarge… really.)

45 users responded in " Caption this Knife Photo "

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# 1 Jerk Face said, on December 20th, 2008 at 3:33 pm

“and in this picture, taken immediately before her decapitation….”

# 2 Sister Mary Hand Grenade of Quiet Reflection said, on December 20th, 2008 at 3:46 pm

I’m the updated Lorena Bobbit.

[You were blacklisted. I took you off the blacklist. - ed.]

# 3 Hugh Ripper said, on December 20th, 2008 at 3:58 pm

That’s not a knife. THIS is a knife…

# 4 Nemesis said, on December 20th, 2008 at 4:27 pm

Piss me off, and I will CUT YOU UP!

# 5 hhopper said, on December 20th, 2008 at 4:35 pm

“Tee hee hee, I’m such a cut-up!”

# 6 bcook47 said, on December 20th, 2008 at 4:39 pm

If you can be married by Elvis here in Vegas, why can’t there be a Stephanie’s Circumcision Emporium?

# 7 scorpusmaximus said, on December 20th, 2008 at 4:40 pm

(lightning) There can be only one! (Queen soundtrack)

Wait until you see the stick of butter…

# 8 Lee.K said, on December 20th, 2008 at 4:41 pm

Bring me the large steak too.

# 9 Gary, the dangerous infidel said, on December 20th, 2008 at 5:06 pm

Here’s a waitress who inspires a very large tip!

# 10 Matt said, on December 20th, 2008 at 5:13 pm

And he don’t know…

That I dug my key into the side of his pretty little souped up 4 wheel drive,
carved my name into his leather seats…
I took a Louisville slugger to both headlights,
slashed a hole in all 4 tires…

Maybe next time he’ll think before he cheats.

# 11 Kelvington said, on December 20th, 2008 at 5:16 pm

Jessica Alba prepares to stop her boyfriend for impregnating her again with this simple in home vasectomy kit.

# 12 Zybch said, on December 20th, 2008 at 5:24 pm

In a desperate but confused and misguided attempt to outdo the great Sir Francis Drake, Mary sets out on her quest to circumcise the globe with a giant cutter.

# 13 User7 said, on December 20th, 2008 at 5:26 pm

Who says the customer is always right?

# 14 ican'tbelieve said, on December 20th, 2008 at 5:30 pm

I bet mine’s bigger than yours…..

C’mon, you know SOMEONE had to say it….

# 15 Gary, the dangerous infidel said, on December 20th, 2008 at 5:33 pm

A knife and a smile will get you more than a smile alone.

# 16 hhopper said, on December 20th, 2008 at 5:36 pm

“This is not a big knife. I’m just a very tiny woman.”

# 17 Freyar said, on December 20th, 2008 at 5:37 pm

A screenshot of American McGee’s Alice 2.

# 18 John C Dvorak said, on December 20th, 2008 at 5:41 pm

“I don’t care how big you think your balls are.”

# 19 SN said, on December 20th, 2008 at 6:58 pm

17. “A screenshot of American McGee’s Alice 2.”

OK, you win!

# 20 KennyB said, on December 20th, 2008 at 7:01 pm

The Bris will be performed by Rabbi Jolly Green Giant

# 21 ECA said, on December 20th, 2008 at 7:06 pm

and you think of DIVORCE???

# 22 Uncle Dave said, on December 20th, 2008 at 7:58 pm

The old saying is you never bring a knife to a gun fight, but in this case…

# 23 Ender said, on December 20th, 2008 at 8:00 pm

…and for $189.99 you can buy the Final Fantasy XVII Ultimate Edition Video Game Pack that comes with a replica sword and costume!

# 24 clayman100 said, on December 20th, 2008 at 8:01 pm

Go ahead and show me that bad boy one more time… you pervert.

# 25 Greensaab said, on December 20th, 2008 at 8:19 pm

“How about a slice?”

# 26 ECA said, on December 20th, 2008 at 9:50 pm

LWTS talk, about your LITTLE FRIEND..

# 27 Dale said, on December 20th, 2008 at 11:21 pm

So where’s that giant cake?

# 28 Sneaker Peet said, on December 20th, 2008 at 11:57 pm

The other girls just didn’t cut it.

# 29 rudedog said, on December 21st, 2008 at 2:04 am

The old saying “Don’t bring a knife to a gun fight” means nothing to this young lady.

# 30 eyeofthetiger said, on December 21st, 2008 at 3:17 am

I can’t seem to muster a caption but I have a theory: a person at a retirement home purchased this sword from the QVC knife show.

# 31 jokerfile said, on December 21st, 2008 at 4:18 am

This is the knife required to CUT the Cheese

# 32 amodedoma said, on December 21st, 2008 at 6:40 am

Sir, we’re ready for your circumcision now…

# 33 qsabe said, on December 21st, 2008 at 7:09 am

Daddy told me to always keep this in my waistband.

# 34 Gigwave said, on December 21st, 2008 at 8:13 am

Click photo to enlarge? Really???

# 35 Raff said, on December 21st, 2008 at 9:44 am

Hey! Look what I found up on Silent Hill.

# 36 ECA said, on December 21st, 2008 at 12:54 pm

WHO needs a chastity belt..

# 37 Angel H. Wong said, on December 21st, 2008 at 1:56 pm

Circumcision through the eyes of an uncut man.

# 38 noname said, on December 21st, 2008 at 5:42 pm

Long Knives Mary wanted to show she’s not afraid of a little knife.

# 39 Ringo said, on December 21st, 2008 at 8:05 pm

Final Fantasy roleplaying just got serious.

# 40 BigBoyBC said, on December 21st, 2008 at 9:31 pm

I dug around to find-out what this picture was about and found the following description:

“The so-called “Stollenmaedchen” (fruit loaf girl) of Dresden, presents a giant knife in Dresden on November 20, 2008. Hoffmann will use the 1,6 meters knife, weighing 12 kilograms, at the opening of the fruit loaf festival on December 6, 2008 to cut a giant fruit loaf, weighing 3.5 tons. The “fruit loaf” (stollen) is a culinary speciality of the eastern German city.”

The truth seems as funny as some of the captions you guys came up with…

# 41 Greg said, on December 22nd, 2008 at 3:23 am

His majesty will see you shortly.
Now remember he his big and green, which could be scary, but he really is jolly, so don’t you go worrying about nothing. He never drops his flatware, but watch out for the peas.

# 42 lividd said, on December 22nd, 2008 at 8:02 am

Thanks for the insight, Bigboybc

# 43 deowll said, on December 22nd, 2008 at 12:49 pm

If you think the knife is big wait till you see the cake!

# 44 Russell Bynum said, on December 22nd, 2008 at 12:53 pm

“Don’t make me angry; you wouldn’t like me when I’m angry… now who wants cake!?”

# 45 jay henry said, on December 31st, 2008 at 7:53 am

You looking at me? Are you looking at me?

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