This was the top story on AP at 3:50pm PST. Since AP will sue your ass for posting or linking to their stories, I present the story from one of the other 342 sources Google has links to about this Earth shattering development. I’m sure glad nothing else is happening in the world to push this story from the headlines.

On the eve of Father’s Day, the First Father showed how it’s done, taking his daughters Malia and Sasha for some frozen treats at The Daily Godmother, a boutique custard parlor in Alexandria.

President Obama and his girls motorcaded over to Alexandria from the White House this afternoon. Malia had a waffle cone of vanilla custard and Sasha had her vanilla custard in a cup. The president enjoyed a cup of vanilla custard with hot fudge and toasted almonds, a pool reporter was told by the shopkeeper. The three were in the shop for about 15 minutes, where they sat at a table to enjoy their snacks.

As they left, the trio received applause from the staff and customers inside and a small crowd outside. Carrying a bag of frozen “puppy pops” for the First Dog, Bo, Obama waved to the crowd before stepping into his SUV for the short jaunt back to the White House.