Sick Decadence Dept. Luxury yachts offer pirate hunting cruises

Published on June 25th, 2009

Ananova – Luxury yachts offer pirate hunting cruises — Only the Russians would dream up something like this.

Luxury ocean liners in Russia are offering pirate hunting cruises aboard armed private yachts off the Somali coast.Wealthy punters pay £3,500 per day to patrol the most dangerous waters in the world hoping to be attacked by raiders.

When attacked, they retaliate with grenade launchers, machine guns and rocket launchers, reports Austrian business paper Wirtschaftsblatt. Passengers, who can pay an extra £5 a day for an AK-47 machine gun and £7 for 100 rounds of ammo, are also protected by a squad of ex special forces troops.

The yachts travel from Djibouti in Somalia to Mombasa in Kenya.

I guess this takes elephant hunting to a different dimension.

Found by Rick Salsman.

48 users responded in " Sick Decadence Dept. Luxury yachts offer pirate hunting cruises "

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# 1 Here's Johnny said, on June 25th, 2009 at 6:54 pm

I like it!

# 2 faxon said, on June 25th, 2009 at 7:01 pm

This is a truly sick idea, obviously dreamed up by gun nuts. Disgusting.

# 3 faxon said, on June 25th, 2009 at 7:02 pm

I wish I could afford it.

# 4 Hugh Ripper said, on June 25th, 2009 at 7:25 pm

So I’m assuming you can differentiate pirates from fishermen and other sea-faring folk by the jolly roger, eye patch and parrot on their shoulders?

Alternatively, this could be an ingenious scam perpetrated by the pirates themselves.

# 5 KMFIX said, on June 25th, 2009 at 7:29 pm

I guess that’s one way to solve that problem.

# 6 faxon said, on June 25th, 2009 at 7:34 pm

#4… “when attacked, they retaliate…” I guess if you’re attacked by “fishermen and other sea-faring folk” you still can blow them to hell. Can’t you?

# 7 Hugh Ripper said, on June 25th, 2009 at 7:35 pm

#6 Assuming the punters aren’t bored to death when pirates don’t show and they open up on the next poor bastard they see.

# 8 faxon said, on June 25th, 2009 at 7:37 pm

We need something similar in California. Tax it, and the Governor will approve it.

# 9 faxon said, on June 25th, 2009 at 7:38 pm

#7… Typical liberal response to a good idea…

# 10 jgerhardt said, on June 25th, 2009 at 7:42 pm

If someone is willing to pay to go into harms way to act as bait for ruthless predator, I say let ‘em.

If they get blown up no loss, if they can take out these “pirates” then good for them.

# 11 agp1 said, on June 25th, 2009 at 7:44 pm

So you pay somebody to take you to a place where you entice a person or persons into attacking you so you can kill them. Sorry that’s just sick.

# 12 Hugh Ripper said, on June 25th, 2009 at 7:49 pm

#9 Didn’t say its a bad idea, but a bunch of (presumably) drunken rich rednecks armed to the teeth and cruising around looking for something to blow up doesn’t make the ‘worlds most dangerous waters’ any safer IMHO.

Also, there’s something inherently evil and disgusting about the rich embarking on a human safari.

# 13 Eric said, on June 25th, 2009 at 7:52 pm

Everything I’ve read about the pirates is that they are running an insurance scam. They have black/grey market lawyer/brokers who contact the shipping companies, who put them in contact with the lawyer/brokers for the insurance companies (like AIG) to negotiate a settlement. The insurance company pays out a fraction of the total income they receive in premiums (and raise them due to increased risk), and the Somalian pirates earn a living. The brokers make a percentage of the take, which can be millions of dollars in some cases. Everybody wins.

Now the Russians want to screw up the system by shooting people. How long does anyone think this will last?

# 14 Greg Allen said, on June 25th, 2009 at 8:06 pm

This story needs a BS meter.

# 15 AdmFubar said, on June 25th, 2009 at 8:20 pm

well lets hope they publish their tourist pictures on flikr!
would like to see the reaction of the pirates when they are suddenly be shot at after picking out a easy looking target…
should have them thinking twice..

# 16 Raff said, on June 25th, 2009 at 8:52 pm

Where does one find out the legalities of international law on the high seas?

# 17 Don said, on June 25th, 2009 at 9:16 pm

Well, at least the PREY has a chance to shoot back. Sounds like a lot of fun to me. I’ll take the RPG launcher though.

Don

# 18 Improbus said, on June 25th, 2009 at 9:19 pm

[sarcasm]

Could the NRA setup tours of Detroit?

[/sarcasm]

# 19 GetSmart said, on June 25th, 2009 at 9:41 pm

I call BS, looks like a comedy website. Well done though. Left off the http and www.

tothepointnews.com/content/view/3617/85/

# 20 Michael said, on June 25th, 2009 at 10:05 pm

Hey, have you seen this news article?
New details about Michael Jackson’s Death Emerge
I was wondering if you were going to blog about this…

# 21 BubbaRay said, on June 25th, 2009 at 10:13 pm

#19, thanks, I knew I had seen this somewhere before

# 22 Chris Mac said, on June 25th, 2009 at 11:17 pm

switch to paint balls and they could prolly have an industry there..

# 23 amodedoma said, on June 25th, 2009 at 11:42 pm

Violent people are always looking for reasons to justify their vice. This is something that’s not really that surprising. What I do find worrisome is the fact that a boatload of vodka swilling russian rednecks is likely to kill themselves before they even find any pirates to shoot at. Make an interesting base for a film though.

# 24 Cursor_ said, on June 26th, 2009 at 12:47 am

If it were true in any way, it would be still against international law and the people assisting and doing the killing would be murderers.

Its a bogus story for sure.

Cursor_

# 25 Fat_Anarchy said, on June 26th, 2009 at 2:41 am

Even though its clearly a satire article, its nice to see how eager most of this board is to be involved in killing some people in the open seas. I’d advise going to therapy, or getting a hobby or something.

Most of these pirates are living in dire poverty, with a starving AIDS-infested family, and they see piracy as the only way to make money in such a situation. The ones you’d be killing are the grunts. The local young men doing anything they can to feed their starving family. The rich ones exploiting these people are not the ones who are on the boats. But hey, who cares, right? As long as we get to kill some desperate individuals doing whatever they can to feed a dying family, its all good right? Also, most of them are of an age which we would consider children, which makes it extra fun, right? You’ll have a nice pile of dead children for you, and be back in time for church!

# 26 Special Ed said, on June 26th, 2009 at 3:16 am

Cool! At least freeze the paint balls first.

# 27 Mr Diesel said, on June 26th, 2009 at 3:27 am

Yes it’s bullshit. All you have to do is look at the prices for ammo.

The Barrett 50 cal would not be much use on a moving ship. The AR would be a better choice for keeping them away from you and the AK would be better up close.

Yes it is satire but it’s good satire. Get over yourselves people. It’s called humor. Dark yes, but still just humor.

I don’t condone killing pirates unless they are trying to kill me and there isn’t much chance of that in my office.

# 28 Mr. Fusion said, on June 26th, 2009 at 3:41 am

To those who think this is satire, think again. It isn’t.

And even so, you can not justify the criminality of the “pirates” simply because they are poor. Nor can you justify the bloodthirsty attitude of the cruise vigilantes simply because they are rich.

# 29 Toxic Asshead said, on June 26th, 2009 at 4:39 am

Don’t kill pirates! The increase in pirates is what halted Global Warming.

www dot venganza.org/about/open-letter/

# 30 GF said, on June 26th, 2009 at 4:51 am

The long arm of international law…yeah, right. The pirates don’t seem a bit worried. And even if they were there is always a loophole some lawyer and his cronies will find or pay to make happen. It’s a rich mans/womans world. Paris Hilton video tapes her blatant illegal drug use and it ends up on the net and yet no one is arresting her sorry ass. So, don’t hold yer breath bout ‘international law’ coming to the rescue – them Japanese sure do a lot of whale research.

If’n you want to change the world get filthy stinken rich. Then you can buy elections and make people do a little jig you want while throwing money at them.

# 31 RTaylor said, on June 26th, 2009 at 4:53 am

I’ve grown to believe there is a syndicated crime link to these pirates. There is a reason you fly the flag of a country when you enter a port. You obey the laws of that country, and not just the one you are registered under. A ship on the sea can be armed with naval guns, you just have to take them off when you leave international waters. When a foreign war vessel enters a port, weapons are usually demilitarized. Firing pins and receivers are usually removed to the master of arms safe, and the magazines are under guard. Missiles and defensive weapons are locked out by the ships captain or first officer.

# 32 Dallas said, on June 26th, 2009 at 5:17 am

Very creative Russian idea.

However, I’m not keen on commercializing vigilante justice like the right wing wackos here.

I prefer law and order over witch hunts. This is one area that separates the Repugnant’s from liberals.

# 33 Patrick said, on June 26th, 2009 at 5:17 am

Probably bogus but not illegal (private vessels can be armed). I thought I saw this idea posted on this blog a long time ago. Use an M2 with a naval mount, will work great.

# 34 gquaglia said, on June 26th, 2009 at 5:30 am

Sick? Nope! Hope they kill as many pirates as possible. That’s what they used to do in the 1700s.

# 35 Sinn Fein said, on June 26th, 2009 at 5:39 am

Its MUCH better than hunting an endangered species who can’t fight back and don’t have a chance, eh? And, its not like the pirate-killers initiate a fight so, pirates? Kill’em all.

# 36 Benjamin said, on June 26th, 2009 at 5:39 am

I think it would be a good idea to rid the world of pirates, even though statistically pirate are inversely proportional to global warming.

Those who justify privacy are wrong. Piracy is armed robbery on the high seas. Would you be justifying armed robbery at your local gas station where people just selling gas can be killed by these thugs? I’ll site the source: http://www.news14.com/content/headlines/590782/two-killed-in-gas-station-robbery/Default.aspx

Armed robbery should be stopped whether it takes place on land or sea. The only way to stop it is to be armed.

# 37 Mr. Fusion said, on June 26th, 2009 at 8:25 am

#34, gq,

That’s what they used to do in the 1700s.

So you still live in the 1700’s? I knew the wing nuts were behind the times but three hundred years?

# 38 Patrick said, on June 26th, 2009 at 8:50 am

# 36 Benjamin said, “Those who justify privacy are wrong. Piracy is armed robbery on the high seas. ”

Lib nut cases LOVE to justify violent criminals and to attack those who would eliminate them. This leads to very bad things. See per capita murder in LA as the city government went from conservative to liberal over the last several decades.

# 39 brendal said, on June 26th, 2009 at 8:55 am

Blame it on Disney – in fact, just blame everything on Disney.

# 40 oscord said, on June 26th, 2009 at 9:56 am

http://somalicruises.com/testimonials.php

its a joke.

# 41 Patrick said, on June 26th, 2009 at 10:33 am

# 40 oscord said, “its a joke.”

I was afraid of that. Oh well, someone will probably do it.

# 42 PcMaster said, on June 26th, 2009 at 11:06 am

If Wirtschaftsblatt reported it then it must be true.

# 43 deowll said, on June 26th, 2009 at 3:16 pm

Sounds like fun if you are in the Russian mafia.

Do they get to keep the heads and is there a taxidermist on board?

# 44 clancys_daddy said, on June 26th, 2009 at 4:48 pm

#12 Rich redneck mean your cousin owns a new double wide. So while they may be heavily armed and drunk I doubt they can afford the cruise. Hey wait a second NEW DOUBLE WIDE!!! That makes me the successful one in the family. Time to go pirate hunting.

# 45 I'm a Gun Nut said, on June 27th, 2009 at 10:49 am

It sounds like a fun time.

Why should the United States, France and England’s Military have all the fun hunting the Somali Pirates.

I just wish I had the money to play.

# 46 BdgBill said, on June 27th, 2009 at 3:50 pm

An awesome idea. We should try something similar on the Mexican border.

# 47 A frenchy said, on June 28th, 2009 at 7:17 am

When western states are unable to do their job, private initiative has to come.Russia after defending communism, now show the way for capitalism, private intiative and free entreprise.
Good initiative.
It is morally a duty to enforce free navigation in international water and to cope with piracy.
It is nothing wrong to use those scum as target and hang them at the mast if captured.
Now, if you can mix that with a ship cruise holiday, it is perfect.

# 48 kidragakash said, on July 13th, 2009 at 10:13 pm

This isnt true…

The article is debunked on Snopes.com

It has the article word for word…

Didnt think Dvorak wouldnt bother checking the legitimancy of news articles before posting them up…

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