Given how well the Drug Czar and all the other czars that have been created have done, I want a ‘I Need A Raise’ czar to fix an urgent need in our country to ensure those of us who deserve a raise get one. And a ‘Junk Food With No Calories’ czar to deal with the obesity epidemic in my belly because junk food makers need to keep their addictive product’s taste while reducing their calories to zero. I’m sure you can think of others we need to fix our problems. Desperately. More czars! More czars!

As concerns mount about the presence of Asian carp near Lake Michigan, U.S. Sen. Dick Durbin today urged President Obama to appoint a carp czar to oversee efforts to keep the invasive species out of the Great Lakes.

“We need to have one person who coordinates the efforts of the federal, state and local agencies that are doing everything they can to keep the Asian carp out of Lake Michigan,” Durbin said during a news conference at the Shedd Aquarium. “We believe it’s absolutely essential.”

Durbin was responding to the discovery of a bighead carp, a variety of Asian carp, during routine sampling this week in Lake Calumet, just six miles from Lake Michigan. Standing beside environmental advocates who have championed closing Chicago-area locks as a way to prevent carp from entering Lake Michigan, Durbin called the finding a possible “game changer” and said “we have to take it very seriously.”




  1. ReadyKilowatt says:

    U S and A, home of the Czar.

  2. Lou says:

    Looks like we wil be fishing for Carp in lake Mish in 2 years.

  3. Anonymous2173 says:

    The sign of a great people: can’t keep the Mexicans out and can’t keep the carp in. Also lousy at real football.

    USA! USA!

  4. Father says:

    Just kill everything in the lake, and start over.

    That What God Would Have Done.

  5. admfubar says:

    just put a bounty on their heads, americans will fish them to extinction then..

  6. Floyd says:

    Actually there is a bounty on carp in some states. Nasty fish…

  7. dadeo says:

    We should have a czar czar..

  8. ECA says:

    Can I suggest something interesting.
    WE used to have predator fish in many of our Rivers and sea ways.
    THEY ATE these fish.
    The MOST requirement for these fish was FAST fresh moving water, < 20 foot deep.

  9. lynn says:

    How about a Crap Czar? I could use a government pension.

  10. Cursor_ says:

    Eat these fish.

    That solves the issue.

    Cursor_

  11. Angel H. Wong says:

    #10 Cursor,

    Tilapia is a disgusting fish that’s raised is filthy water yet people eat it at fine restaurants with abandon.

    If you can cheat people by telling them they’re eating tilapia filet instead of carp they wouldn’t even notice the difference.

  12. Cursor_ says:

    #11

    There are a lot of fresh water animals that live in muck and filth and we eat them. From eels to catfish.

    Clean, gut, batter, fry and enjoy.

    There is nothing edible by humans that doesn’t taste better battered and fried.

    Hell you can even make a stuffing with these carp shove it in a squash blossom, batter it, fry it and serve it at a fancy restaurant and people would pay 8-10 bucks a plate. With a lemon and dill aioli and you have them on their knees.

    Cursor_

  13. Glenn E. says:

    The problem ISN’T that we’re not getting enough raises. It’s that the US Congress IS!! And that they also way over spending beyond what the government is collecting in taxes. Basically, they’re taxing the future, by deficit spending. So the money we earn today (and save) becomes worth much less in the future. And while the Congress always gets a Cost of Living adjustment to compensate for it actions increasing inflation. The rest of us aren’t getting our wages and savings so “adjusted” upward.

    As for food. They regulate drugs for efficacy and their side effects. But they’ve left the processed food industry pretty much get away with adulterating food stuffs, anyway they see fit. And since few of us have the time to make everything we eat from scratch. We’re subject to the machinations of greedy corporations, who care more about making addictive food, than wholesome food. And damn the blood pressure levels, SALT BOMBS AWAY!

    Rather than telling these guys what they can manufacture. Regulate their advertising language, so that they can’t keep labeling things “natural”, “organic”, “healthy” and “pure”. When they’re not.

  14. BubbaRay says:

    We’re subject to the machinations of greedy corporations, whPo care more about making addictive food, than wholesome food. And damn the blood pressure levels, SALT BOMBS AWAY!

    They may be greedy, that doesn’t seem to stop millions of people from listening to their advertising and buying their products. How do you think they got to be so successful?

  15. Norman Speight says:

    I have a solution.
    About a couple of years ago there was a huge scream up in England because it appears that Polish people are quite fond of Carp in the festive season. They had been cartching carp in our fishing lakes and taking them home to eat, whereas addictive fishing types just catch them and put them back. Shock horror, scandal.
    Now, from this it appears that all you need is some Poles, then, end of Carp!
    By the way, we invite them here because they are – seemingly – good plumbers. Supposedly better then ours.
    Seems to me like a win win situation.
    All the plumbers you will ever need and no Carp. What are you waiting for?

  16. The0ne says:

    This is a huge problem that’s been going on for years now. We do need to stop them before they get to the lakes. Once they’re there the problem and solution(s) to eradicate them becomes 99% impossible.

    Regardless of how this news was presented here, if you’re interested in the problem do some more research. I like fishing as a means to relax, not actually catching a fish hahaha, but wouldn’t like the thought of lakes filled with just carps :P