DANVERS, Mass. — A Massachusetts family got the Halloween scare of a lifetime by getting lost inside a dark and creepy Salem-area corn maze and had to call 911 for rescue. Danvers police say they got a call of distress from a mother of two about 6:32 p.m. Monday. The woman alerted the 911 operator of their situation in the Connors Farm in Danvers, a short distance from Salem. A voice recording of the 911 call was made available to the media on Wednesday. The exchange:

Woman: “Hi, I just called. I’m still stuck at Connors Farms. I don’t see anybody. I am really scared. It’s really dark and we’ve got a 3-week-old baby with us.”

Dispatcher: “Just relax. Calm down. Your husband is with you right?”

Woman: “Yes, but my baby?”

Dispatcher: “OK. I understand and the police officer is on the way.” Woman: “We thought this would be fun. Instead it’s a nightmare. I don’t know what made us do this. It was daytime when we came in. And I never take my daughter out. This is the first time. Never again.” Farm owner Bob Connors said Wednesday his maze on seven acres was created so that people would get lost in its towering stalks.

Connors said it was a busy day and he left the farm and his farm manager about 6:20 p.m. Monday, only to return a short time later. Connors said he received a phone call from a friend who told him about police squad cars at the family farm at 30 Valley Road. “People like to take their time and we don’t like to rush people out of the maze,” Connors said. “We like to give people their money’s worth.”

He said a Danvers police with a tracking dog quickly plunged into the depths of the maze with a farm manager to search for the disoriented dad, mom and two young kids. Within a minute or so upon arrival, the police officer located the family. The family didn’t realize they had almost made their way out; they were just 25 feet from the street, Connors said.

Look on the bright side, at least they had plenty to eat.



  1. denacron says:

    Sadly they have already reproduced.

  2. paul says:

    aw poor people. probably quite distressing with such a new baby. leave them alone, stuff happens.

    toronto, can.

  3. Tim Bonham says:

    Well, the new baby had the least worries about food — her mother was carrying her, and mother’s breasts were available!

    • msbpodcast says:

      You’re assuming that the bitch knew that she could feed the kid with ’em.

      That may have been too much to ass-u-me considering the transcript of the conversation…

  4. AlanB says:

    Someone should relieve the husband of his man card.

  5. Mr Ed - the Imitation (accept no original) says:

    They couldn’t have just cheated and made their own path to the street?

  6. jackyardbackoff says:

    “Daddy government Im scared! Come save me!”
    this is clearly the logical conclusion of over 100 years of rampant liberalism. Im sure the government is very pleased at their creation. These idiot liberals are so helpless they cant get through corn. Its no wonder Ron Paul cant get elected. I have no doubt that corn mazes will quickly be banned. They ban everything else up there.

  7. Publius says:

    @jackyardbackoff said: “idiot liberals”

  8. deowll says:

    A corn stalk isn’t a fence post. There was nothing to prevent these people from picking a direction and walking in a straight line till they were out.

    How do they know they’re going in a straight line? This was night. Head toward on of those little lights up in the sky.

    Good bless them. I wonder if they had been off concrete before.

  9. overtemp says:

    Have they sued the maze operator yet?

  10. Faxon says:

    And they get two votes.

  11. sargasso_c says:

    Personally, I blame Monsanto.

  12. Glenn E. says:

    Hmmm. Maybe it’s not such a good idea to create a seven acre corn maze, considering today’s average level of American IQ scores. A proper “public maze” would have many exits. So even the stupidest person would feel a sense of accomplishment. This maze might even be considered a death trap. Luring in the unsuspecting dopes, who get lost after making three right turns.

    Actually, it’s very likely that anyone smart enough to get out of such an elaborate maze. Would be too smart to go into it, in the first place. What’s the point of being bewildered for half an hour? It’s not like they were promised a cash prize, at the end. Or a lost treasure, somewhere within. This particular family should stick to playing board games. At least until the baby is old enough to help them escape the next maze of maze.

  13. pierrelarsen says:

    Amazing, there are even guides on the Internet on how to do corn mazes (for Darwin Award candidates?)

    http://wikihow.com/Find-Your-Way-Through-a-Corn-Maze

    On the other hand – I find the instruction to always walk left or right ambiguous. It presumes that people know the difference between right and left. Furthermore if they do – then it presumes people know how to make the choice and stick to it.

    Well, enjoy mazes while they last. Now the government knows that they are dangerous and they will soon go the same way as the chemistry set – to insure no one is hurt.

    BTW – I do feel sorry for that baby. Alas, you don’t pick your parents.

    • pierrelarsen says:

      Here in Europe they are all but gone except for the ones with entirely inoffensive substances you basically can ingest.

      Not like the ones that used to be around. You could make nice fires, lots of smoke in different colors and blow up stuff.

      Mothers were complaining a bit, but otherwise I think most kids survived quite unharmed and maybe a bit wiser. I figure most kids using a real chemistry set would not be stuck in corn maze.

  14. So what says:

    Can’t………………………..Stop…………………………Laughing…………………………………….Must…………………………………………Breathe………………………….Please……………………..Tell……………Me……………………….The………………………..Cop………………………Tased…………………Them………………………………..Both……………………….Idiots.

    • Skeptic says:

      John!!! John!!! 911!!! There’s a problem with the above post. It goes on and on and on, and I’m lost! help me get back to the replies! Pleeease! I’m all alone with your new baby blue.

      • So what says:

        Well that’s interesting. I would like to say I knew that would happen, I didn’t, glitch with the format?

  15. spsffan says:

    I certainly hope that this is one of those communities where you get a bill for services after calling 911. I’d say about $30,000 should do it.

    I hope nobody died of a heart attack or bleeding to death waiting for help while the responders were out picking this worthless bunch of flesh out of the corn!

    Considering it is Salem, Mass. I’d say “Burn her!” or at least “Build a bridge out of her.”

  16. Neil says:

    Put your left or right hand on the maze
    walk round maze keeping your hand on the maze
    eventually you will find your way out.

  17. Farmer John says:

    City people. They’ll make a good food source when the Big Breakdown comes. I mean, so many of ’em and all. And apparently they’ll be easier to kill than newborn kittens.

  18. Mr. Obvious said, says:

    How to get out of a cornfield for Dummies.

    Find a row of corn.
    Follow it.

  19. Dum Dum says:

    I would have called sooner, but I could not find the “Any Key” on this phone.

  20. Muddauber says:

    should the title be:

    Maize for Blondes

  21. miahmdparash says:

    Hello

    It’s a nice article it will help my research.

    Thanks


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