Durex just announced what it’s calling “Fundawear”, which ostensibly stands for “fun underwear” but which Durex believes will eventually come to mean “article of clothing that is fun like once ever and until you realize what horror you’ve wreaked in your pants and never want to talk about it again.”

The undergarments are loaded with touch technology, and are controlled by a smartphone app—an iPhone in the demo videos—that knows what gender your partner is. The app has diagrams of your partner’s crotch, which you drag your finger across to stimulate their actual crotch from wherever you are in the world.



  1. sargasso_c says:

    A bit late for April Fools?

  2. Captain Obvious says:

    Or you could, you know, get a date.

  3. BigBoyBC says:

    Steve Jobs must be spinning in his grave.

  4. pedro says:

    Finally! Something that can take DUhllass away from the blog

    • noname says:

      pedro missing your crush already?

      • pedro says:

        Defending your lover already, nobrain?

        Don’t worry, he’ll still love you even if he buys these undies.

        • noname says:

          Defending who, your crush? Defending the object of 90.2% of your blogs? Defending the person you name in 95.3% of the time?

          poor pedor, don’t continue to worry or be jealous or afraid! Be brave, openly admit the focus of 97.3% of affectionate writings and continue your ongoing typing of Dallas longing notes. We all want you to be happy!

          I am just another hapless observer of your continuing aggressive dallas infatuation and your endless “couples bickering”.

          Isn’t your 10yr “Kitty Couples” anniversary soon? We all can’t wait to see how you celebrate with more and more longing notes to Dallas! You know, it’s now ok to be out in the open; you don’t have to hide your courtship anymore!

          We all hope you’re not snorting the free clinic condoms again and instead have finally learned good contraceptive behaviors. The doctors did say if you take your prescriptions your behaviors will improve. Take your pills!

          • pedro says:

            If you were trying to convince us you don’t care about your love DUhllass I assure you, you’ve done the opposite.

          • noname says:

            Who is the “US” you are referring too pedro?

            Would it be dallas and you?

            You just can’t help yourself posting about dallas can you?

            Again, don’t worry, no need to be jealous of others, dallas is yours.

            You found the desire of your dreams now keep him and make him a honest man! Don’t deny yourself anymore.

            Good Luck!

          • pedro says:

            Is understood that DUhllass will wear the thing but, who’s gonna have the app, you or DUHllass?

          • noname says:

            pedro, is that what has you’re so worried?

        • Dallas says:

          You should get one of these panties for you and your donkey and overcome the language barrier.

          • pedro says:

            Why? I don’t swing your way, sheeple!

          • noname says:

            Your the bitch in the relationship, right?

          • pedro says:

            What, you know that from your own experience with DUhllass?

          • noname says:

            pedro, is that what has you’re so worried?

          • pedro says:

            Who said I’m worried?

            I’m not the one writing multi-paragraph declarations of love disguised as defending statements.

          • noname says:

            pedro, who’s defending statements are your writing, your own? Embrace your feelings and itchy discharges!

            Your constant stalking of dallas is the clear sign of your love for him. You know it, we all know it!

            In years gone, people would say your sick. Today, your love is icky but trendy!

            Go to dallas and be his all excited bitch. Fulfill your dreams and endless desires!

          • pedro says:

            No amount of denial will cover your every defense for your luv DUhllass. You’re the one that should be worried by not embracing that luv and calling yourself a bitch.

          • noname says:

            poor pedro still stalking his crush, dallas.

            Your infatuation maybe psychotic, but; it’s true!

            Don’t let us stand in your way pedro.

            Go to dallas, pedro and show him your love; let it grow with the smallest of dreams; let your love show and you’ll know it’s the season!

            pedro, let that feeling grab you deep inside and send you reeling where your love can’t hide!

          • pedro says:

            First you defend DUhllass and now you attack him? That schizoid behavior is only explained by luv.

            Nobrain luvs DUhllass

          • noname says:

            pedro, your loyalty and defense shows how noble your dallas love is!

            It’s okay, take time and say how dallas means something erotic to you! Continue to honor, cherish and stalk.

            What you make of this dallas love is what defines you! The more you lose yourself stalking dallas, doesn’t make you less of who you are?

            Go to dallas, be complete and one with love!

          • pedro says:

            Your luv for DUhllass is so big that your comments have become as predictable as his.

            Next, you’ll fall in love for Alfie

          • noname says:

            pedro, your loyalty and defense shows how noble your dallas love is!

            It’s okay, take time and say how dallas means something erotic to you! Continue to honor, cherish and stalk.

            What you make of this dallas love is what defines you! The more you lose yourself stalking dallas, doesn’t make you less of who you are?

            Go to dallas, be complete and one with love!

        • noname says:

          pedro, is that what has you’re so worried?

          Afraid of losing dallas control or the controller?

          First, take slow deep breaths. Calm yourself pedro, dallas is yours, go to him!

          You know you can’t help yourself. You must and you will continue writing your dallas flattering tributes. Your percentage of dallas notes will now only get higher.

          Now, go to dallas and be his all excited bitch. Fulfill your dream and endless desire!

          Please continue to keep everyone in this blog sphere informed of your dallas exploits.

          Enjoy and Good luck pedro!

          I will continue to do my best to help diagnose pedro obvious mental problems and recommend effective treatments. Pedro, next time, maybe we should revisit your prescriptions? Your behaviors are ever more aberrant.

          It looks like all the contributing pedro doctors in this blog sphere will have to continue their mission to mix it up with you and your pills schedule.

  5. Peppeddu says:

    … and when someone will try to go thru airport security with that thing on, we will hear about it in the news.
    “remove all your electronic devices” :)

  6. Mextli says:

    “…knows what gender your partner is”

    Don’t the au courant think that’s all in the mind anyway?

  7. Benjamin says:

    How is this a good idea?

    Is it sexual assault to hack this app?

    Someone is going to use this underwear to remote detonate a bomb.

  8. Admfubar says:

    Fundawear, it’s orgasmictronic!

    plugs in theremin and plays Beach Boy’s “Good Vibrations”

    • noname says:

      Yes and you’ll have Fun, fun, fun ’til daddy hacks in and takes the T-Bird away!

  9. Uncle Patso says:

    I can’t see how these things could be machine-washable.

    I also can’t see taking them to the dry cleaner.

    • noname says:

      Best stain removal is a heavy wash with good detergent with fabric softener and no dry cleaning.

  10. The Monster's Lawyer says:

    “I think I’m turning Japanese, turning Japanese…”

  11. mojo says:

    iFondle

  12. Dick Head says:

    Talk about catching a VIRUS or getting HACKED!

    OUCH!!!

    This also reminds me of that one episode of “The Big Bang Theory” where they made remote kissing devices (where Howard and Raj tested it out in front of Leonard). Now, all we need is a data glove or two and we may see a whole new virtual sex ndustry pop up! (Get it? “pop up”!) It would also make me wonder wonder what the DMCA might say about it too!

  13. Daniel Kaiser says:

    Jock TWICH?

    American Raspberry Pi?

    I/O I/O?

    80211.Pee?

    Port Forwarding?

    Multi Touch?

    Hack “n” Sack?

  14. Lee says:

    Hi
    The first thought that occurred to me was who is going to wear these knowing that they are at the mercy of whoever has control of the I phone. Then I thought this could really take off as a novelty item.

    Made me laugh thanks lee

  15. Com123and4 says:

    There has been no better pairing of a picture and a news article in a long time.

  16. Jason Waver says:

    Please, please tell me this isn’t real life.