Expert witness

A German court has awarded 3,000 euros ($4,100) in damages to a man who had to have the top of his skull replaced with plastic because of a faulty hospital fridge.

Doctors removed the top of the man’s head and put it in cold storage while they operated on his brain, the court in the western city of Koblenz said Tuesday. Because the refrigerator was defective, the section of skull was not kept cool enough and could not be reattached. Doctors replaced the bone with a plastic prosthesis.

Here’s the good part.

Compensation of 3,000 euros was “appropriate and sufficient,” the court ruled. “The experts consulted by the court concluded the new skull roof was better than the original”.

I guess he’s lucky they didn’t charge extra!



  1. jlm says:

    it was nice of them to put a monetary value on an irreplaceable part of his body

  2. Mister Mustard says:

    Does that come with hair?

  3. Misanthropic Scott says:

    It’s not lost, just spoiled rotten, literally.

  4. GigG says:

    #1 it obviously wasn’t an irreplaceable part because they did replace it. And even if it was irreplaceable what do you think a court is going to do other than put a price on it?

  5. will says:

    Better than the original? Is this the equivalent of an enquirer story or is it for real? Makes me shudder the horror in this. Here is a months pay or so; Sorry we didn’t keep your skull on ice because of our broken equipment. Have fun taking one trip somewhere with your new cabeza.

  6. Misanthropic Scott says:

    #5 – will,

    Obviously, better than the original means that motorcycle helmet laws no longer apply. Also, the man may now ignore all “Hard Hat Area” signs. Why is that hard to understand? Finally, being plastic allows for a wide variety of choices in colors and finishes. I’m thinking of getting this done for cosmetic reasons alone!

  7. Jim Shaffer says:

    Fortunately the idea that the legal system should put a monetary value on someones physical integrity isn’t prospering here in europe. In the US this guy would’ve been set for life with a multi million dollar settlement. Social Medicine, it’s like trying to sue the government. But maybe that’s why it’s possible in the first place. Oh, and since I moved here in 85 I’ve had top notch medical attention and hospitalization for myself and my family. My 3 kids were born here too. I know what both systems are like and personally I prefer Socialized Medicine.

  8. Misanthropic Scott says:

    #7 – Jim Shaffer,

    Good choice!! I wonder if the U.S. will ever be able to get it passed. There’s just so damn much money fighting it. Every year, the health care industry lobbies for ways to make even more money then has more money with which to lobby against good health care in this country. Wanna bet on whether the $100,000,000/yr CEO of United Healthcare has an HMO??!!?

  9. Cinaedh says:

    According to my email Inbox, I can get a much better penis for a lot less than 3,000 euros.

  10. The Monster's Lawyer says:

    #6 – I would go for chrome.

  11. Misanthropic Scott says:

    #11 – Sag,

    Well, even though it’s slightly used, it’s cheaper, low mileage, and has had only one owner.

    For my replacement, I’m going with British racing green with two white racing stripes, slightly off-center and a lump on the right for the overhead cam. I just love that retro look.

  12. nightstar says:

    GigG said:

    “it obviously wasn’t an irreplaceable part because they did replace it. And even if it was irreplaceable what do you think a court is going to do other than put a price on it?”

    What do you figure your balls are worth mate? What say we take em out and give you some silicone replacements with a complimentary cheque for 3k euros.

  13. tallwookie says:

    that hospital is sooooo lucky that they’re in europe – over here in the states, if you’re at a hospital and they fuckup, and you sue…. lol

  14. Misanthropic Scott says:

    #13 – nightstar,

    I’ll take it. It’ll more than cover the cost of my vasectomy plus years of interest.


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