Apple To Announce Revolutionary No-Keyboard Macbook

Published on January 6th, 2009

Your Uncle Dave is not a happy guy. I just bought a Macbook a few weeks ago with a keyboard. I wonder if I can exchange it…

29 users responded in " Apple To Announce Revolutionary No-Keyboard Macbook "

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# 1 pedro said, on January 6th, 2009 at 5:32 am

Give credit to the guy that found it.

# 2 AC_in_Mich said, on January 6th, 2009 at 5:47 am

god love the onion

# 3 Paddy-O said, on January 6th, 2009 at 6:00 am

Hilarious. I’d bet fan boi’s would buy it if actually produced.

# 4 Benjamin said, on January 6th, 2009 at 6:20 am

So how do you write with it?

# 5 Paddy-O said, on January 6th, 2009 at 6:25 am

# 3 Benjamin said, “So how do you write with it?”

It is in all Apple stores starting today. You got to try it to see how simple it is.

# 6 GregA said, on January 6th, 2009 at 6:37 am

Im running down to stand in line this evening.

# 7 gmknobl said, on January 6th, 2009 at 6:51 am

HA! Gotta love the Onion.

# 8 QB said, on January 6th, 2009 at 7:16 am

As a Mac owner I’ve got to say that I thought this was hilarious. Disaster President is still my favourite in the last few months.

# 9 CZ 75 said, on January 6th, 2009 at 7:27 am

The Lisa. Completely stupid thing. Especially the part about how the wonderful new battery will power it for NINETEEN minutes before needing a recharge. I guess you need a long extension cord if you want to take it out of the house.

# 10 Lee said, on January 6th, 2009 at 7:28 am

This is what you get when your CEO starves his body of vital nutrients. Brain stops working so well.

# 11 Wretched Gnu said, on January 6th, 2009 at 7:33 am

Oh my. The greatest thing about this post is reading the comments from those who don’t know… well, I’ll leave it at that.

But the video pretty much sums up my feeling about Apple.

# 12 QB said, on January 6th, 2009 at 8:03 am

Wretched Gnu (great name), the onion does so many little things right that it looks real. The background posters and decor, the people wandering around, the awesome fake hardware and software, etc.

I’m always impressed by their attention to detail.

# 13 Paddy-O said, on January 6th, 2009 at 8:05 am

# 10 Wretched Gnu said, “Oh my. The greatest thing about this post is reading the comments from those who don’t know…”

Shhh.

# 14 chuck said, on January 6th, 2009 at 8:14 am

I remember seeing the first Macintosh model when it came out. For a while the keyboard was sold separately. I was told that because the Mac used the revolutionary “mouse” pointing device that a keyboard was unnecessary.

# 15 Mister Mustard said, on January 6th, 2009 at 8:14 am

Haw. Good one. I wasn’t paying close attention, and didn’t realize what was going on until the guy said “everything is just a couple of hundred mouse clicks away”. Until then, it seemed reasonable to think that Apple would come out with such a product. Don’t they still ship their computers with the lame 2-button mouse?

# 16 Paul said, on January 6th, 2009 at 9:05 am

There’s a 40gb model for a bit over $9000 …

# 17 BigBoyBC said, on January 6th, 2009 at 10:04 am

They should just dump the wheel in favor of a bluetooth suppository…

# 18 Dave W said, on January 6th, 2009 at 10:15 am

Well, considering that the entire world seems to be out there texting on cell phones with number keyboards, I think it could catch on!

Oh, except they have to raise the base price to give it more snob appeal.

# 19 sargasso said, on January 6th, 2009 at 11:25 am

Someone wake me up when The Onion is funny again.

# 20 Ultraslug said, on January 6th, 2009 at 11:33 am

Loved the “Predictive Sentence Technology”. What a timesaver!

ThE aRl<aeaSK`liu +------------------------------------------+ + The aardvark admitted its fault. + + The aardvark admitted it was wrong. + + The aardvark asked for an aardvark. + + The aardvark asked for a dagger. + + The aardvark asked for health. + + The aardvark asked for a ride. + + The absinthe arrived by airmail. + + The abortion went well. + + The actor asked for an aardvark. + + The actor asked for abstinence. + + The actor asked for redemption. + + The advertisement was effective. + + The agile aardvark arrived by airmail. + + The agile aardvark bathed with beauties. + +------------------------------------------+

# 21 cgp said, on January 6th, 2009 at 11:43 am

This IP is going to be copied.

LOL LOL oh I have to go iP.

# 22 Montanaguy said, on January 6th, 2009 at 11:50 am

Perfect. Hunt and peck has been replaced by spin and peck. Pretty funny stuff.

# 23 ECA said, on January 6th, 2009 at 11:58 am

Onion, yep i know them..

BUT,
the MOUSe isnt the best device for many things.
And how many of you KNOW the keyboard, and have HUNTEd for a better one?
Those of you in gaming, and use the Keyboard, KNOW that MICE CAN SUCK.

# 24 deowll said, on January 6th, 2009 at 4:06 pm

I’m sure uncle Dave will love his as much as he loves his iphone.?*^)

# 25 pedro said, on January 6th, 2009 at 5:49 pm

#19 Oh, poor macfan had his ego bruised.

# 26 Uncle Dave said, on January 6th, 2009 at 6:55 pm

#24: No iPhone. Just a Macbook and first gen Mac Mini.

I’m waiting for an iPhone that has a full sized keyboard.

# 27 pedro said, on January 6th, 2009 at 7:10 pm

#26 I can send you a chair. That wait for the keyboard on the oy!Phone could be long.

# 28 ECA said, on January 6th, 2009 at 7:58 pm

12,
WHY fake it..?
Go to the show and just GRAB your people to do it..Jump into someone ELSES group and show off THERE stuff with your skit.

# 29 Ron Larson said, on January 6th, 2009 at 9:46 pm

Brilliant!

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