Pr0n Sales Have Gone Limp — A $5 Billion Bailout Should Be The Economic Viagra It Needs

Published on January 7th, 2009

Posted by Uncle Dave in Politics, economy

Is the porn industry up next for a bailout? If porn titans Joe Francis and Larry Flynt have anything to do with it, it will.

Yes, ladies and gentleman, the titans of pornography are begging for a bailout.

Joe Francis, creator of the “Girl’s Gone Wild” video series, and Larry Flynt, founder of Hustler, will ask Congress for a $5 billion bailout, according to TMZ.

Why does the porn industry need a bailout? Because apparently even porn is getting smacked by the recession.

XXX DVD sales have taken a hit – about a 22% hit, according the TMZ.

“With all this economic misery and people losing all that money, sex is the farthest thing from their mind,” Flynt is quoted as saying on TMZ. “It’s time for Congress to rejuvenate the sexual appetite of America.”

Francis thinks that the porn industry deserves a bailout just like the auto and financial industries got, and he said he’ll go to DC to get it, according to TMZ.

“Congress seems willing to help shore up our nation’s most important businesses; we feel we deserve the same consideration,” Francis is quoted as saying on TMZ.

25 users responded in " Pr0n Sales Have Gone Limp — A $5 Billion Bailout Should Be The Economic Viagra It Needs "

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# 1 Ron Larson said, on January 7th, 2009 at 2:08 pm

TMZ…. such a reliable source of news.

# 2 bobbo said, on January 7th, 2009 at 2:11 pm

#1–Ron==you are missing the point. Yes, TMZ is pretty reliable for celebrity/sleaze news.

I assume Flynt is in this for the humor/social commentary value and Joe Francis because he really believes he deserves it.

Excellent. The bailout is all about “jobs” to begin with. I’ll leave you to your own rimshot.

# 3 Mister Mustard said, on January 7th, 2009 at 2:18 pm

#2 – Bobbo

TMZ may be reliable for celebrity/ sleaze news, but they seem to have gone to the Bobbonian School of Punctuation Science:

“Joe Francis, creator of the “Girl’s Gone Wild” video series, and Larry Flynt, founder of Hustler”

Everyone knows the video series is calle GIRLS GONE WILD. “Girl’s Gone Wild” would imply that there is only one girl, and she’s gone wild. Clearly, there are numerous girls.

# 4 McCullough said, on January 7th, 2009 at 2:19 pm

Finally, A bailout I can get “behind”.

# 5 bobbo said, on January 7th, 2009 at 2:31 pm

#3–Mustard==exactly==do you go to TMZ for sleaze or for punctuation studies? Funny you would highlight your maso-punctiliousness on a thread tangent to pornography.

hahahahahahahahahahah!

# 6 Angel H. Wong said, on January 7th, 2009 at 2:37 pm

Porn sales are down but booze sales are up.

# 7 RTaylor said, on January 7th, 2009 at 2:49 pm

That would be a day I would have C-SPAN on. I can imagine how Flynt and his entourage would show up.

# 8 Improbus said, on January 7th, 2009 at 2:58 pm

Pay for porn? What is this, the 90s?

# 9 Cap'nKangaroo said, on January 7th, 2009 at 4:43 pm

The only bigger media “whore” than Larry Flynt may be Madonna or P*TA. This is all about the amount of coverage he can gather with a simple appearance on TMZ. I’ve seen about 4 mentions from CNBC to Headline news to local news in one afternoon.

Does anybody else feel they need a hot shower after seeing a couple minutes of TMZ?

# 10 amodedoma said, on January 7th, 2009 at 4:45 pm

If it’s Flynt it’s a joke – I love that guy. Still it’s just a matter of time before another industry comes begging/demanding a bailout. Maybe every man woman and child in the US should sue for a bailout before it’s too late. When the long term consequences of the crisis and the government bailouts finally start to be felt more industries will demand bailouts. Sure looks like things are gonna get alot worse before they start to get better. How long can the US stand to hemmorage money in this way?

# 11 pedro said, on January 7th, 2009 at 4:54 pm

#5 I think that punctuation fixation is a manifestation of what’s called being anal. I don’t know if it means the same in Mr. Flynt’s line of work.

# 12 Mister Mustard said, on January 7th, 2009 at 4:58 pm

#5 – Bobbo

>>do you go to TMZ for sleaze or for
>>punctuation studies?

From you, Bobbo, I expect clownish punctuation. From a “journalis”, even a hack journalist, I expect a little more erudition.

# 13 Mister Mustard said, on January 7th, 2009 at 4:59 pm

#11 – ‘dro

It figures a Kuzconian would dismiss the importance of punctuation, particularly in a case where it completely changes the entire meaning of the sentence.

# 14 pedro said, on January 7th, 2009 at 5:55 pm

#13 My post was more along the lines of completing what Bobbo started. You gotta admit, it was an easy ball to hit.

# 15 Mister Mustard said, on January 7th, 2009 at 6:01 pm

#14 – ‘dro

>>My post was more along the lines of
>>completing what Bobbo started.

Yes, but it was YOU who introduced the concept of “anal”, alluding to the pornographic implications of that term. Suggesting, perhaps, that I eagerly await Sea Lawyer’s Seaman in our three-way homoerotic love fest.

¡Putamadre, m’hijito! You Kuzconians run hot, doncha??

# 16 bobbo said, on January 7th, 2009 at 6:03 pm

Gee Whiz, balls, bones, and the right to return. Where is Joe the Plumber when you need a flush?

# 17 pedro said, on January 7th, 2009 at 6:23 pm

#15 Angel’s the horny one around here. He’s no Kuzconian.

Talking about punctuation, you did spanish exclamation marks but not the question ones, how come?

# 18 GetSmart said, on January 7th, 2009 at 7:27 pm

If the shite gets any deeper this whole thread will need a bailing out.

# 19 Freyar said, on January 7th, 2009 at 7:47 pm

Riiight.. as if porn itself needs a bailout. There will always be money flowing for this stuff. Whether it be Viagra or otherwise. :/

# 20 Mister Mustard said, on January 7th, 2009 at 8:04 pm

#17 – ‘dro

>>Talking about punctuation, you did spanish
>>exclamation marks but not the question ones,
>>how come?

I only use the Spanish punctuation with Spanish words. So, for example “¡Putamadre, m’hijito! gets the “¡”. “You Kuzconians run hot, doncha??“, not being in The Loving Tongue, does not get “¿¿”. Entendido?

# 21 Sea Lawyer said, on January 7th, 2009 at 8:13 pm

You keep mentioning me. Obsessing can’t be good for you.

# 22 ren said, on January 7th, 2009 at 9:36 pm

um, I actually could see sales for Hustler and GGW going down considering they’re using an outdated selling model. I’m pretty sure you won’t see ohhhhhhh BangBros or Blacks on Blondes on here because they distribute through that newfangled technology that just came out, the intarwebs.

besides GWG is boring and the girls in Hustler are usually pretty nasty

# 23 Mike D said, on January 8th, 2009 at 5:53 am

Bailout Porn . . . let’s see

Bailout the big banking firms – they in turn take exclusive “retreats” at facilities most of us can only dream of . . . increase foreclosures, kick families into the streets, triple credit card interest rates for no apparent reason – because they can, all in the name of profit at any cost. You know these “people” have our best interest at heart.

Bailout the big three Detroit trash companies . . . they in turn will decide what America wants to drive, just like the past 30+ years – ignore the markets, blame the American workers, etc. . . . the results speak for themselves – unreliable, lousy fuel mileage (with a few notable exceptions), built in foriegn countries for slave labor wages, cheapest parts possible, no worker benefits, no EPA, few parts of US origin . . . isn’t NAFTA wonderful? It could be if applied fairly and correctly.

Maybe we should bailout the current for profit health care system . . . Let’s see . . . Nixon liked the Kaiser Healthcare model of for profit health care, made it the US National Model for Healthcare (yes this is how our current mess started in the early 1970s – before this it was all not for profit and healthcare was affordable with or without health insurance), flash 35 years into the future . . . the US has the best healthcare money can buy – if you have money . . . people – not just the poor, but middle – upper class find themselves uninsurable, ouside of group health care – work, or medicare (retired – disabled – which is at least a two year battle to receive in itself) for health care due to medical conditions – lowers healthcare company’s profits . . these same healthcare companies CEOs made close to $1 billion in salary + benefits in 2007. Yes we need to bailout the healthcare companies, the CEO’s and their crony staffs need new shoes. Lose your job, too young to retire – then do your country a favor, save your family from financial ruin, and die – that’s the message being sent. Strange – we are the only industrialized country I know of that assumes the disabled applicant is a liar (receives no benefits) until the individual can prove their disability – usually through court – lawyers, lose your life savings, the house, job, everything in the meantime. Every other industrialized country automatically assumes you are disabled on your word unless it can be proven otherwise – benefits are immediate.

Bailout porn . . . well at least I know I will receive a tangible return of some possible benefit here, as for the previous three mentioned bailouts . . . our “average citizen” return on the investment . . . bend over, you’re going to love this . . .

Or maybe, just maybe the ordinary US citizen may just need a little help from our own government. Not a handout but a hand up. After all, who, in the end, will be handed the check? But no – can’t do that . . . it could be socialist . . . God forbid.

Wake up people . . . agree or not take back your government. Profit, yes – but maximizing at all cost?

# 24 wiglebot said, on January 8th, 2009 at 11:57 am

This is an industry transition and will not get a bailout.

Everyone is migrating to the amateur stuff — the wives’, girlfriends’, MILFs’ and neighbours’ porn. Maybe that is greener porn? It grass roots porn anyway.

Also referring to the above discussion, the word “Anal” is being phased out of porn. It too closely resembles “Analysis.” And wall street ruined that word for good.

# 25 Rick Cain said, on January 8th, 2009 at 7:00 pm

Lower the legal porn age to 15 and watch sales skyrocket.

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