Madoff Suicide Watch!

Published on June 29th, 2009

Posted by SN in crime

39 users responded in " Madoff Suicide Watch! "

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# 1 Greg Allen said, on June 29th, 2009 at 5:02 pm

I absolutely loath smug rich guys who cheat and destroy people’s lives.

But I don’t share your glee in his possible suicide.

# 2 denverken said, on June 29th, 2009 at 5:11 pm

Who gives a crap? just do it

# 3 Uncle Don said, on June 29th, 2009 at 5:11 pm

The Farrah Fawcett Method

An anus death, pure and simple.

# 4 Li said, on June 29th, 2009 at 5:15 pm

Why is there no option for “He will ‘die’ of a heart attack, there will be a closed casket funeral, and he’ll spend his last days in Paraguay drinking Mai Tais with G.W. and Ken Lay.”

# 5 Poppa Boner said, on June 29th, 2009 at 5:21 pm

Get him a can of gas and a match. This guy is too much of a pussy to take h

# 6 Poppa Boner said, on June 29th, 2009 at 5:22 pm

…his own life.

[Har! finger slipped onto the Enter key eh? - ed.]

# 7 Special Ed said, on June 29th, 2009 at 5:23 pm

They should make him listen to Alfredone and die a slow painful death.

# 8 Jägermeister said, on June 29th, 2009 at 5:23 pm

Madoff – Tip #1

# 9 bobbo, spotting the existential question said, on June 29th, 2009 at 5:24 pm

Madoff is a clinical psychopath. He lives by thinking he is smarter than the rest of us which on average he is. The truth often leads to error in the conduct of human decisions.

No, Madoff will live as long as possible trying to take advantage of fellow prisoners and the prison system. In jail, out of jail, no difference as long as he is taking advantage of someone else.

He will die from a shank.

# 10 zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz said, on June 29th, 2009 at 5:27 pm

If he goto real prison, there be people lined up to learn his trade.

# 11 jasmoran66 said, on June 29th, 2009 at 5:46 pm

He’ll be fine. He’s already cooking up a Ponzi scheme involving cigarettes. It’s how he rolls.

# 12 N74JW said, on June 29th, 2009 at 5:51 pm

I hope the Aryan Brotherhood, or the Latin Kings, MS-13, or whomever make a playground out of his ass…

# 13 Jägermeister said, on June 29th, 2009 at 5:58 pm

#11 – jasmoran66 – He’s already cooking up a Ponzi scheme involving cigarettes. It’s how he rolls.

And the only difference is that the investors in that scheme will rip him apart when it becomes apparent to them that they’ve been cheated.

# 14 Me said, on June 29th, 2009 at 6:09 pm

Yee Hawwwwww, God I love Un-PC polls. LMAO

As far as prision, this guy is going to a Federally run country club. I gurantee within the year he will have weekends at home.

# 15 Jägermeister said, on June 29th, 2009 at 6:14 pm

#14 – Me – As far as prision, this guy is going to a Federally run country club.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=xPcql4FuCK0

# 16 sargasso said, on June 29th, 2009 at 6:15 pm

Put him in charge of prison finances (but don’t let him take up rock collecting).

# 17 Ah_Yea said, on June 29th, 2009 at 6:23 pm

He will die of old age. I bet you he is too much of a coward to take his own life. His crimes were indiscriminate and “clean”.

No, he will live out his last days trying to rehabilitate his “good name”. Try to leave a positive legacy.

Watch him become “born again” and see the evil of his ways and offer to counsel the feds or whomever. Anything to be remembered in a positive light.

Think Richard Nixon…

# 18 Truthie said, on June 29th, 2009 at 6:46 pm

UncleFart says he will go cryo and live out his sentence as a frozen head. It must be nice.

# 19 Ben said, on June 29th, 2009 at 6:46 pm

Tasteless.

# 20 faxon said, on June 29th, 2009 at 6:52 pm

This guy is really going to jail for his family, all of whom will be reaping the rewards of his scandalous crimes for decades. I say put the old lady in jail, along with his entire family.

# 21 Alfred1 said, on June 29th, 2009 at 7:03 pm

I doubt he is suicidal…and as a financial expert, he knows our economic armageddon is near…no telling what will happen to those in prison then, they may be released:

http://inflation.us/videos.html

As someone said…he probably is wheeling and dealing with cigarettes or something.

# 22 Named said, on June 29th, 2009 at 7:07 pm

So, he’s not going to pull a Ken Lay?

# 23 chuck said, on June 29th, 2009 at 7:09 pm

Do we get to watch?

# 24 gmknobl said, on June 29th, 2009 at 7:29 pm

As horrible as the jerk is, this is a sick poll.

# 25 mr. show said, on June 29th, 2009 at 7:29 pm

He deserves to rot in jail but kind of poll is is ghoulish.

This passes for entertainment? What is this 4chan?

# 26 bobbo, knowing twigs grow as they are bent said, on June 29th, 2009 at 7:31 pm

#17–Ah Yea==rare, but EVERYTHING you posted is wrong. I guess the saving grace is, its only an opinion?

He will die of old age. I bet you he is too much of a coward to take his own life. His crimes were indiscriminate and “clean”./// Old age–yes. Bravery/Cowardace doesn’t factor into the equation of a psychopath. His crimes were intentional and long term and dirty to all others involved.

No, he will live out his last days trying to rehabilitate his “good name”. Try to leave a positive legacy./// No, again, he doesn’t care. He might try to demonstrate how clever he was but his good name is completely wrapped up in how clever he was, perhaps how much he stole. What affinity scam artist has ever tried to rehabilitate his name?===”Suckers!!”

Watch him become “born again” and see the evil of his ways and offer to counsel the feds or whomever. Anything to be remembered in a positive light./// Not to many Jews, orthodox or reform, become born again. Maybe more likely for non-practicing and “if” he cared about public approval.

Think Richard Nixon…/// Irrelevant. Political crimes everyone does against their “enemies” and he just got caught. Madoffs crimes were worst in that sense that he did it to friends he encourage to trust him. Different dynamic.

I’ve notice a disproportionate number of psychopaths in business and politics. “You are either with us or against us” pretty much sums up their world.

# 27 PatrickAllan said, on June 29th, 2009 at 8:31 pm

Two to the head, of course. (Gun in the left hand.)

# 28 canuck said, on June 29th, 2009 at 8:37 pm

Suicide? You mean give up opportunities to blame it all on the holocaust and demand preferential treatment, forever?

# 29 Gwendle said, on June 29th, 2009 at 9:08 pm

#25,

This is too tame for 4chan.

# 30 bobbo, loving a good joke said, on June 29th, 2009 at 10:36 pm

Here’s more financial analysis:

Once upon a time in a place overrun with monkeys, a man appeared and announced to the villagers that he would buy monkeys for $10 each. The villagers, seeing that there were many monkeys around, went out to the forest, and started catching them.

The man bought thousands at $10 and as supply started to diminish, they became harder to catch, so the villagers stopped their effort. The man then announced that he would now pay $20 for each one.

This renewed the efforts of the villagers and they started catching monkeys again. But soon the supply diminished even further and they were ever harder to catch, so people started going back to their farms and forgot about monkey catching.

The man increased his price to $25 each and the supply of monkeys became so sparse that it was an effort to even see a monkey, much less catch one.

The man now announced that he would buy monkeys for $50! However, since he had to go to the city on some business, his assistant would now buy on his behalf.

While the man was away the assistant told the villagers. ‘Look at all these monkeys in the big cage that the man has bought. I will sell them to you at $35 each and when the man returns from the city, you can sell them to him for $50 each.’

The villagers rounded up all their savings and bought all the monkeys. They never saw the man nor his assistant again and once again there were monkeys everywhere.

And now you know how the stock market works.

——Reminds me of the Repuglicans wanting to invest Soc Sec in the Stock Market==pure rape of the American stockholder/retiree to the benefit of the monkey man above.

# 31 NoAgendaist said, on June 29th, 2009 at 11:08 pm

Obviously, two to the head.

# 32 soundwash said, on June 30th, 2009 at 12:10 am

1) He will have his death faked with a hollywood quality dummy, either enroute to the (to be announced) Federal jail, or
in jail.

2) Some sort of “calamity” will happen he will be part of a mass release or he will just “disappear”

(do modern jail’s use magnetic gates
that open during power *complete* failure?)

No “money man” voluntarily pleads
guilty without an exit strategy.

-s

# 33 LDA said, on June 30th, 2009 at 3:46 am

Bloodthursty monkeys.

# 34 Jess Hurchist said, on June 30th, 2009 at 4:43 am

Suicide?
Have there been no death threats?

# 35 Abe Vigoda said, on June 30th, 2009 at 5:20 am

Madoff absolutely deserves the punishment he got.

However, bozos like SN that show their true colors and sick, sadistic inner loathing through such a tasteless poll deserve their own public scorn. Way to go, SN! Keep up the “great” work! Boo!

# 36 Great American said, on June 30th, 2009 at 7:05 am

How about this tin foil hat idea?

He’ll be given a Presidential pardon after it is “discovered” he was covering up for his sons. After he is released from jail, then start worrying about him being “suicided”.

# 37 deowll said, on June 30th, 2009 at 7:48 am

This is a tough man. I doubt that he will kill himself. At least not as long as his wife hangs in there with him.

At his age if he gives in to dispair he will most likely just die.

# 38 MoreGruelPlease said, on June 30th, 2009 at 8:25 am

Do not want him dead. Death is a release.

Want him alive and suffering for many, many years and decades.

# 39 OvenMaster said, on June 30th, 2009 at 5:53 pm

I’d want to make sure he sees every single one of his and his wife’s Swiss bank accounts raided and distributed to his clients first. What I would find offensive is to permit taxpayer money to be spent to keep him alive after that.

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