WASHINGTONIn what government officials are calling a stirring testament to the leadership and foresight of late U.S. president Ronald Reagan, nearly $20 trillion in low denomination bills were discovered this week buried in the White House Rose Garden.

Sealed in hundreds of old mason jars, crumpled shoe boxes, socks, metal tins, and oven mitts, the financial windfall is believed to have been stashed away by Regan, then 76, during his second term.

“Our economic worries are no more,” announced a jubilant Barack Obama, who claimed that the remarkable find would sustain the struggling nation for the next two decades. “Not only did President Reagan manage to anticipate a crippling recession 20 years ahead of time, but it appears he left behind all of the resources we would need to overcome it.”

Found by Misanthropic Scott.




  1. bleh says:

    #31 Sorry, I thought it would embed the image. Maybe if I add html tags.

    Worst joke ever!

    http://blog.mrhacks.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/08/comic_book_guy.jpg

  2. bleh says:

    #31, 32…Nope. giving up.

  3. Buzz says:

    Republicans wish.

  4. Sidnfrank says:

    Hell,If He had that much foresight, why did he not find a way to cure the disease that killed him?

  5. #14 – jbenson2,

    Will you radical right wing nut jobs ever realize that the financial crisis we’re in today was directly caused by 28 years of unbroken voodoo Reganomics and rampant deregulation of all industry, including the Clinton years, of course?

    No. Because you are unwilling to reexamine your old ideas in light of new facts.

  6. LibertyLover says:

    FUNNY!

  7. Turns out he was a complete fucking lunatic.

    So true!! We would have been better off with Bonzo.

    I wonder how long it will take for even the right wing nut jobs to realize that the financial problems we’re in today are the direct result of 28 unbroken years of gush-up, voodoo Reaganomics, including through the Clinton years.

    It’ll probably never happen. I can’t wait to read what the nut jobs are going to say in response to this.

    #14 – jbenson2 — How do you still stick with a right wing position even after seeing what such policies wrought?

  8. qb says:

    #39 Mister Scott,

    Ironically Bush Sr. raised taxes to balance the budget and imposed some fiscal discipline. The right and left crucified him for it but enjoyed a relatively prosperous 90’s because of it.

    Bush Sr. won a war, straightened up the economy, and was basically an honorable, honest guy who made tough decisions. Obviously that just doesn’t pay. Of course, he had zero charisma. 😉

  9. “Ironically Bush Sr. raised taxes to balance the budget and imposed some fiscal discipline. The right and left crucified him for it but enjoyed a relatively prosperous 90’s because of it.

    Bush Sr. won a war, straightened up the economy, and was basically an honorable, honest guy who made tough decisions.”

    Uh… correct me if I’m wrong, but didn’t Clinton beat Bush Sr. precisely because the economy was in the shitter?

    Or am I just making up that whole “it’s the economy, stupid!” campaign?

  10. Thomas says:

    “In a related note, although most hoped Obama would spend the money paying down the debt, he has stated that he has already earmarked the money for foreign auto maker bailouts, foreign bank bailouts, NOW grants and research into solar powered PEZ dispensers.”

  11. qb says:

    #41 During most of his term the economy was in recession so Bush made unpopular decisions which, in hindsight, turned things around. By the time Clinton took office things were looking pretty rosey. Perot also got 19% of the vote.

    I’m not trying to paint Bush Sr. as a super hero or anything but he made difficult decisions rather than be an ideologue. He also lost an election because of it but he left the place in much better shape than when he came. Personally, I think he is the most under-rated President of the last 30 years.

  12. #41 – qb,

    Um … he also doubled the national debt in just four years. And, that war appears to still be going on.

    http://tinyurl.com/ll7ga4

    He also mostly continued the tax and economic policies of Reagan even after calling them Voodoo Economics. So, honorable? No worse on that scale than most politicians perhaps, but certainly no better.

    As for quality of his presidency, all I can say again and again and again is that he doubled our national debt in just four years. He was probably the worst of the borrow and bomb crowd … until his son came along.

  13. Rabble Rouser says:

    So Raygun KNEW that with all the garbage that he started, that the country would be broke.
    I always knew he was a BASS TURD!

  14. Uncle Patso says:

    # 34 Alfred1:
    “…I wonder, as outsiders, what do you all think of the human race?”

    [MOSTLY HARMLESS]

  15. Thomas says:

    #45
    I don’t buy it. The debt went from 3.2 trillion in 1990 to 4.3 trillion in 1993. A sizeable increase to be sure but far from double. That’s a 1.1 trillion dollar increase. By comparison, Clinton raised the debt about the same amount over his eight years. The “conservative” Bush II, raised it by at least 2.75. The way Obama’s going he’s going to blow Bush II’s numbers out of the water. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/National_debt_by_U.S._presidential_terms#FY2009)

  16. Your Alter Ego says:

    Alphie,

    If brains were made of dynomite, you couldn’t blow your own nose.

    When they were handing out brains, you thought they said trains so you’re waiting for the caboose.

    At first you had two brains. Now, one is lost and the other is looking for it.

    Your sister is an only child.

    There is a traveling carnival in West Texas that wants their idiot back. Please, GO HOME.

    Your mother doesn’t wear army boots. She wears runners. That way she can get out the bathroom window a lot faster when she sees you coming.

    With all due respect to your father, the best part of you ran down his leg.

    Your mother developed Alzhiemers before she had anything good to say about you.

    You are a walking, talking, crapping, example of why abortion should be widely available.

    You are as funny as a screen foor on the front enterance of a submarine.

  17. Tom Architect says:

    421,213 feet high …. That’s how high the “white house (south) lawn” would have
    to be stacked to hold the $20 trillion. I find it hard to believe that Ron could have eaten that much peanut butter. I think he was mainly into exotic jelly beans.

    The math on the 3 dimensional volume of that much moola follows.
    From Google Earth it seems the area of the south lawn, up to the road
    that cuts it off, is 720 x 350 feet, plus or minus. That gives an area of 252,000 s.f., or 5.785 acres.

    Assume the “low denomination bills” were ones, stacked tightly, covering that
    whole lawn …..

    in one dollar bills that stack would be 421,377 feet high.
    If they were C-notes, that stack would be 4,213 feet high.

    Do we sniff a gross insult of the intelligence of all americans – especially the ones who completed
    third grade math?

    It’s dimensions are around 6.15 x 2.59 inches.
    That gives it a volume of .005309499946 (etc) cu. ft.
    Twenty trillion of these has a volume of 106,189,999,989.381 cu. ft. (just over 106 billion cubic feet).

    Divide that by the two-dimensional area of the lawn, to get the third dimension, the height of the stack:
    106,189,999,989.381 cu. ft / 252,000 s.f. = 421,377 ft. high.


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