“You? Want this? Hahahaha!”

Vaibhav Bedi, 26, is seeking £26,000 from [Lynx] parent company Unilever for the “depression and psychological damage” caused by the lack of any Lynx effect.

Court officials in New Delhi have agreed to order forensic laboratory tests on dozens of his half-used Lynx body washes, shampoos, anti-perspirants and hair gels.

Lynx – marketed as Axe in India – is famous for its saucy ads showing barely clothed women throwing themselves at men.

But Bedi says in his court petition: “The company cheated me because in its advertisements, it says women will be attracted to you if you use Axe. I used it for seven years but no girl came to me.”

This clown couldn’t possibly have a case, could he?

India’s leading compensation litigator Ram Jethmalani warned: “There is no data to substantiate the supposition that unattractive and unintelligent men don’t attract women.

“In fact some of the best looking women have been known to marry and date absolutely ghoulish guys. I’d suggest that the company settles this issue out of court.”

Time for a class action lawsuit, right, shlumpy guy in the corner smelling like Ol’ Spice?

  1. chris says:

    Ugly, with money, does attract women. The man is just looking for a little help here.

  2. Jägermeister says:

    Sometimes it require something more than deodorant to get the Lynx effect…

  3. LibertyLover says:

    #2, egads. You need to put a warning on your links. You’re gonna cause a heart attack.

  4. Zybch says:

    John gave a detailed account of what a ‘novelty fuck’ is, in No Agenda #100.
    One of his funniest bits.
    Surely this guy could have at least gotten a few of these, though if he smelt like a chemical factory then his chances might have been a bit slim.

  5. John McNeally says:

    I dont understand what is the problem… You north americans keep on suing companies for the most stupid reasons like “put the cat in the microwave and died” one and another ahole that just decided that he had a patent in water bottles and sued pepsi..

    GIMME A BREAK okay? You, as a whole bunch of morons, cant say anything about stupid behavior from other people.

  6. Father says:

    Am I wrong to say this topic isn’t worthy of DU?

    Maybe I’m too serious, but with 6 billion people on the planet, there are bound to be 1000 stories per day about guys getting their penises stuck in door jams, women’s failed lip and boob jobs, children with their head stuck in a fence, on and on.

    The No Afgenda show is likewise losing momentum and relevancy.

    I’m just trying to be helpful, as there is serious competItion out there, and I find myself increasing going elsewhere.

  7. Zybch says:

    #5 Last time I checked, New Delhi wasn’t in North America.

  8. ubiquitous talking head says:

    You guys miss the point. This is EXCELLENT.

    Imagine the consequences if you could sue and WIN for failing to have your penis enlarged, buy a house for $55, take scratches out of your car’s paint, get brighter whiter teeth in 15 days, improve your memory, make money fast, teach your 2 year old to read, eliminate acne overnight, and so on and so on, etc etc.

    I might actually be able to watch TV again without all those hucksters. Just because the Axe ads rely on the long standing american tradition of letting hyperbole slide doesn’t mean that their claims should be actionable.

  9. StoopidFlanders says:

    Why did it take this idiot a whole 7 years to figure out that the product doesn’t work? Couldn’t he have cut his losses after spending the first 3 bucks?

  10. raintrees says:

    Well, it might be one way to get back to truth in advertising…

  11. Jstephe says:

    I hope this guy wins, I am really sick of the advertising community selling us blatant lies with no consequences.

  12. StoopidFlanders says:

    10,11. I think we need a multi-billion dollar government program and thousands of new bureaucrats to affix politically correct warning labels to cans of deodorant. Hey, we can call it a stimulus program and fudge up the unemployment statistics! After all, it’s not the mere citizens’ job to show common sense, we need the government to protect us from making stupid choices. Damn that evil corporation for tricking us into smelling better.

  13. Special Ed says:

    I use Umpire cologne, for foul balls.

  14. nd I'm too sexy for your party Too sexy for your party No way I'm disco dancing says:

    It’s so hard to type with “Babes” crawling all over me, this Lynx stuff is great. Advertising that the use of a certain product will make the user more attractive to the opposite sex that’s a new one. No wonder he feels like he was robbed. Hope this suit is won I’d hate for this advertising technique to catch on.

  15. Don Quixote says:

    Dipshit.. .. Women aren’t attracted by stink, unless it’s the smell of money. He used the wrong attractant.

  16. joaoPT says:

    He should’ve used the car also…

  17. jbellies says:

    Yeah, but it is good advertising for any religion which might tell us that all of these fzckers (and at least one non-fzcker), on both sides, will come back as czckroaches.

  18. Dirk Thundernuts says:

    He couldn’t get a dot head?

  19. yanikinwaoz says:

    Idiot. if he had worn the Three Wolves Howling at the Moon t-shirt he would have all the action he can handle.

  20. Buzz says:

    I rubbed the Axe sampler from GQ on my shlong and got mobbed at the nudist colony. And I’m no particularly outstanding example of Italian manhood. My wife had to pry them off me with a kayak oar, but still, two of them delivered children nine months later.

    Go figure.

  21. right says:

    I read somewhere a long time ago that there are 39,000 lawyers graduating every year in the US. Gotta do something…

  22. right says:

    Oh yeah, it did say India…oops.

  23. Sister Mary Hand Grenade of Quiet Reflection says:

    Just a test, see if you can spot the rich guy:

  24. Animby says:

    Now let’s see: In the comments on the baseball bat killing a kid article, someone had something to say about frivolous lawsuits in the US. I don’t see that comment here. I guess there was no opportunity to bash America.

  25. Mikee says:

    Or it could be that JCD has a good sense of humor


Bad Behavior has blocked 5489 access attempts in the last 7 days.