A species of fish best-known for attacking human testicles has apparently invaded America.

A father and son were fishing in New Jersey when they got a bite from an unfamiliar fish with a startling array of near-human teeth. It was a pacu, a relative of the piranha that is native to the Amazon.

The pacu has accumulated some colourful nicknames – nutcracker, ball cutter – and a sighting in Sweden in 2013 led to a warning for male swimmers to keep their trunks on.

This time the catch came not in Sweden but in Swede’s Lake, a man-made body of water near Philadelphia. Fortunately for Ron Rossi, this particular fish went for the bait.

Mr Rossi knew as soon as he “scooped” the fish that he had “never seen anything like” it. He originally thought he had caught a piranha.

Henrik Carl, a Danish fish expert, said that was a common mistake.

“They are almost identical to the piranha, you couldn’t even tell from the outside,” he explained after the Scandinavian pacu sighting. “It’s just that they have different teeth. Flatter and stronger, perfect for crushing.”

Holy Crap!!!!….I’ll take my chances with the shark.

  1. jpfitz says:

    Oh, thank goodness for shrinkage in colder water.

  2. NewFormatSux says:

    Swede Lake, are you serious?

  3. Man O'Wart says:

    I bet a few feminists are laughing their asses off right about now.

  4. zeph says:

    Ancient news and long-debunked crud. There are reasons I only come to dvorak as a last resort when I’m bored. Or there were reasons.

    • Hmeyers says:

      “A warning over the weekend for male swimmers off the coast of Denmark and Sweden to protect their private parts because of a testicle-munching fish appears to have been a joke that got out of hand.”

      “William Fink, a piranha researcher at the University of Michigan who is also curator of fishes at the school’s Museum of Zoology, poured water on the pacu warning. For one thing, he said, pacus are vegetarian — and there’s no record of them attacking a human.”

  5. Marc Pugner says:

    anybody remember this episode of the Simpsons?

  6. Mr Diesel says:

    Anytime they catch one they should give it a good beat down and Taser it for good measure.


  7. Phil A. Minion says:

    Another violent undocumented immigrant pacu…when will the insanity end?

    • Anthony C. Ferrante says:

      marketing predicts it flops after the release of a poorly-dubbed Pacunado XVII


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