Amusing, non?
Reasons why the English language is so hard to learn:
1) The bandage was wound around the wound.
2) The farm was used to produce produce.
3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
4) We must polish the Polish furniture.
5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.
6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum
9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10) I did not object to the object.
11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
13) They were too close to the door to close it.
14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.
15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail
18) After a number of injections my jaw got number.
19) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
20) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests
21) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren’t invented in England or French fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren’t sweet, are meat. Quicksand works slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. And why is it that writers write but fingers don’t fing, grocers don’t groce and hammers don’t ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn’t the plural of booth beeth? One goose, 2 geese. So, one moose, 2 meese? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it? Is it an odd or an end? If teachers taught, why didn’t preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell? How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form, by filling it out, and in which, an alarm goes off by going on.
English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all. That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.
P.S. – Why doesn’t “Buick” rhyme with “quick”?
from E. Barnes
I also like all the “official” names for groups of animals:
school of fish,
pride of lions,
flock of sheep,
pack of dogs,
and on and on…
I sometimes wonder about who sat on the committees which decided the important things like that.
Just more evidence of intelligent design.
I’ll cleave to you until you cleave us a apart.
– Precision Blogger
http://precision-blogging.blogspot.com
If that stuff is so hard to understand what happens in an auto translator?
Here’s babelfish english-to-french-to-english. It’s not hopeless:
1) binding was rolled up around the wound.
2) the firm one was employed to produce the product.
3) the discharge was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
4) we must polish the Polish pieces of furniture.
5) it could carry out if it would obtain the wire outside.
6) the soldier decided to give up his dessert in the desert.
7) since no more time ago like the present, it thought that it was time to present the present.
8) low was painted on the head of the low drum
9) when the projectile with, the dove plunged in the bushes.
10) I did not oppose the object.
11) the insurance was inadmissible for the invalid.
12) there was a line among the oarsmen about the way of rowing.
13) they too were close to the door to enclose it.
14) the male makes funny things when are present.
15) a worker dressmaker and a sewer fell downwards into a line from sewer.
16) to help with the plantation, the farmer taught his sow to be sown.
17) the wind was too strong to roll up the sail
18) after a certain number of injections my jaw obtained the number.
19) by seeing the tear in painting I threw a tear.
20) I had to submit prone to a series of tests
21) how intimate ose of I this to my more intimate friend?
Here’s english-to-german-to-english (QUITE hopeless):
1) the federation around the wound one wounded.
2) the farm one used, in order to produce product.
3) was so full that dump that it had to reject more waste.
4) must polish we Polish furniture.
5) could lead it, if it would receive the line out.
6) decided the soldier to leave his dessert in the desert.
7) it no time like the gift gives there, thought it that it was time, for representing the gift.
8) a bass on the head of the large drum
9) one painted, when shot dipped on, the pigeon into the shrubs.
10) did not object I to the article.
11) was inadmissible the insurance for the invalids.
12) there was a row under the Oarsmen over, as one rudert.
13) were also close it at the door to close to it.
14) does the dollar merry things, if are present.
15) fell a sewer and a sewer down into a sewer line.
16) to sow in order to help with establishing, the farmer informed his tap ditch.
17) was too strong the wind, the sail
18) to windings, after a number of injections my Kiefer received number.
19) after seeing the tear in the painting I buried a tear.
20) had to subject I dependent on a row test
21) as can I of trusted friends of this to my most familiar friend?
Mike Voice, you might want to know that MOST languages have a different word for a grouping of each kind of animal, just like English (except that the specific words chosen differ in most languages). This desire to have special names for groups of animals seems deeply wired into our brains.
– Precision Blogger
http://precision-blogging.blogspot.com
Precision,
I have studied a little Japanese, and I knew that language has a “grouping” or “counting” term, loosely-based on shape (flat, cylindrical, animals, etc) – but I hadn’t realized the flock, school, etc type of naming was so wide-spread.
I must admit most of the English terms do have a “poetic ring” to them – so I wonder if that is deeply wired, as well.