From the Winston-Salem Journal comes this charming story about an elderly fellow, Bill Johnson, who has discovered the image of Jesus in a tree limb that fell in his front yard. He believes it to be a “robed image of Jesus with an outstretched hand. The head is near the center of the limb where the rings of the tree are lighter, giving an almost halo appearance.”

And he’s milked this observation in newspapers and TV… but seriously. Halo, or no halo, that’s not Jesus.

That’s a Dalek.

The two differ in a number of ways. One is the saviour of the world, the Son of God, who died and is risen and will come again in glory to judge the living and the dead. And the other is a mutated Kaled life form from Skaro, bred to believe in its own genetic superiority with a desire to destroy everything else in existence, and a propensity to scream “Exterminate”.

You can work out which is which yourself.




  1. Dan Barker says:

    Its a Dalek… how is jesus meant to burn his image into wood, he has no laser shooting eye!

  2. FRAGaLOT says:

    A Dalek would exterminate trees too.

  3. sashley616 says:

    It is definitely a dalek. Perhaps that chap is an elderly original Dr. Who.

  4. deej says:

    WWDD? Exterminate all humans, I say.

  5. deowll says:

    Looks like a Dalek to me… of course with a little careful wood burning…

  6. admfubar says:

    exterminate the sinners!!! Exterminate The Sinners!!! EXTERMINATE THE SINNERS!!!!

  7. t0llyb0ng says:

    It looks Bugs Bunny in an Aunt Jemima costume.

    But we need a closeup of the “image.” Did I miss that?

    Why would Jeebus have one arm outstretched, again?

    Did Jeebus gain weight? Oh noes.

  8. Gasbag says:

    So if Jesus was a Dalek do you think they would have crucified him?

  9. faustus says:

    I see his blood upon the rose
    And in the stars the glory of his eyes,
    His body gleams amid eternal snows,
    His tears fall from the skies.

    I see his face in every flower;
    The thunder and the singing of the birds
    Are but his voice—and carven by his power
    Rocks are his written words.

    All pathways by his feet are worn,
    His strong heart stirs the ever-beating sea,
    His crown of thorns is twined with every thorn,
    His cross is every tree.

    by Joseph Mary Plunkett who gave his life for ireland’s freedom.

    freedom is where you find it. we piss on it. and soon enough we will wish it again. we will dream it and pray for it. its coming…our time is coming…

  10. Faxon says:

    yawn

  11. Cursor_ says:

    #7

    Chunky Jesus was a parody of Chucky Cheeses I did back in the mid 80’s. A Chucky Cheese style place for christian kids. The animated robots were the the disciples and they had a version of whack a mole but with satan’s head popping up. Ergo Whack A Satan. All other games were christian themed as well.

    My depiction of the christ in it was also rotund because you had to make the costume large enough to get a worker in it. Hence Chunky.

    Cursor_

  12. Rich says:

    “EXTERRRRRMINAAAAATE!”




    The five minutes of my life it took me to read this article, lolz.

  13. BuzzMega says:

    Daleks: The new Jesii.

  14. Skeptic says:

    Caption:

    “Bill Johnson gets a supernatural woody.”

  15. KMFIX says:

    Looks like a wizard to me…about to cast some spells!

  16. Scrumpa says:

    How obvious does it have to be? It’s Aunt Jemima! “Exterminate superstitious nonsense, Y’all!”

  17. Special Ed says:

    I’d like some of that Jesus firewood.

  18. Someone Else says:

    It’s obviously Zombie Jesus.

  19. Camacho says:

    That is not Jesus. That’s KKK clansman. Or a Freemason priest.

  20. JimD says:

    Or it could be the profile of a DoDo Bird …

  21. Rich says:

    I worked with a guy who reminded me of Davros. He rolled around in a powered scooter and everything.

  22. Benjamin says:

    Is a Dalek. Jesus could walk up stairs.

  23. Joy says:

    Being a Christian and DW fan

    this is just a LOL


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