Dvorak Uncensored Exclusive!
Everyone knows that the party who doesn’t have the presidency loses seats in the midterm elections and therefore everyone THINKS the REPUBLICANS are going to gain seats. But the Obama administration and the DEMOCRATS have a surprise for the REPUBLICANS! Their SECRET PLAN is now REVEALED!
Obama is going to announce that he’s going to CHANGE PARTIES and become a REPUBLICAN! That way the party in power will be the REPUBLICANS and the DEMOCRATS can run against the establishment!
Realizing from recent polls that voters have SHORT MEMORIES, the Dems think they can pull it off. After all, the voters and the political pundits have proven voters can’t remember back two years ago. A recent poll asked voters, “Do you think that ignorance and apathy are major problems in America” – 90% of voters responded, “I don’t know and I don’t give a damn!”
After the election Obama will change back to being a Democrat and no one will remember it ever happened. Republican strategist Frank Lutz said, “Republicans should be worried. A plan this wacky just might work.”
Remember – you heard it here FIRST on DVORAK UNCENSORED!
His first winning strategy. Smart Move.
Problem is, other than getting health care reform, that looks to me most likely the main part of it will be struck down in court, Obama has not been much of a Dem. More a Puke light.
Unfortunately, its not Obama or the Dems that need to make a smart move, its the electorate that needs to STOP VOTING AGAINST THEIR OWN SELF INTERESTS!!!
Silly Hoomans: VOTE ALL INCUMBENTS OUT OF OFFICE. and by definition, that includes Obama. I doubt anyone could look good in office following BushtheRetard, but Obama could demonstrate more leadership. Fight the Pukes. Show transparency. Regulate the Financial Fraud that he made legal – – etc.
Is this the Borowitz Report?
Unfortunately, you stumbled over your first sentence: it’s the party that HOLDS the presidency that loses in the mid-term elections…otherwise, great satire.
What I want to know is, when is Barry going to stop campaigning and start governing? THAT is what is going to cost the Dems and (thankfully) I don’t see that they have any remedy.
I also agree with Bobbo, in that we need to regain control of our representation by getting new blood in Congress, on both sides of the aisle. Time for a new term limits amendment.
Marc, are you channeling ECA again?
Another Perkel stream of consciousness post.
#2 Bobbo said, “the electorate that needs to STOP VOTING AGAINST THEIR OWN SELF INTERESTS!!!”
Who are you to determine what my self interests are? Vote how you want and the rest of the electorate and I will vote fore who we want. Your attitude and anyone else who says that stupid quotation is condescending and elitist.
Lame
#7 :
Ehr…. Struck a nerve did he? And elitist? How on earth did you make that connection? Throwing heavy words out there is not really the way to go…
#2 :
Right on! ‘I’m-a-member-of-the-XXXX-party-and-am-going-to-vote-for-them-no-matter-what’ voters should have their right to vote revoked. That’ll do it.
Obama has always been a Republican.
Bloomberg has always been a Democrat.
“”We’ve always been at war with Eastasia”
#7–Benji==what Michael said. Ha, Ha.
Sadly Benji even “politics” and “personal choice” is subject to rational thought processes and not the scify fantasies you spend too much of your time in.
Rational: doing that which advances your goals.
Benji==I have made a dangerous assumption that you want what is best for yourself? Food, clothing, shelter, health care? If I’m wrong about that, please let me know? If leading a good life well is your goal then you should vote to the left of Obama on social issues and to the right of Obama on fiscal issues. That means NO ONE currently serving in Congress had demonstrated their fitness for office.
VOTE ALL INCUMBENTS OUT OF OFFICE!!! Keep it up for 3-4 voting cycles until the criminals get the message. We all may be fighting for the scraps off the SUPER RICH man’s table, but we have the vote. Don’t waste it as your masters wish.
The new boss is the same as the old boss!
Or as George Wallace said “There is a dime worth of difference between them”
And to continue the strategy to the next level:
… In the 2012 presidential race, Obama will declare that he is WHITE (his mother was Caucasian after all). That way he can pick up all the Southern voters who wouldn’t vote for a black man. And by then the novelty of being ‘African-American’ will have worn off anyway.
Clever, eh?
I think that Obama creates some sort of psychotic break in some Americans.
This isn’t funny, nor thought provoking.
As very little effort has been put into it: no detailed satire, nothing more than a silly headline and some hastily thrown together blurbs, no hook, it’s not much of anything.
#13–That is pretty clever. I wonder what ethnicity he is on his mother’s side. I suppose I could try and find out but now that I am typing this..I realize I really don’t care hahaha. I agree with Bobo about voting out all the incumbents for a few cycles. I think that would indeed aid in getting things back on track.
The Dems have had control of Congress a little less than 4 years and the White House for a little less than 2 years. The universal health care bill shoved down the throats of constituents is Obama’s crown jewel.
Strangely the Dems don’t seem to be bragging much about their accomplishments leading into November. The Dem’s strategy? Blame everything on Bush and hope that people will think twice before voting for “Bush’s fiscal policies”. In other words, they’re taking no responsibility for their own actions and just playing the blame game. What a surprise. 🙂
Smells like crack pot bullshit.
Americans are NOT that apathetic to not notice a President changing political parties in the middle of their 1st term. I think this has happened with lower political offices (Governors, Mayors, Congress and Senators). Considering it has never happened before with a President (has it?), i think it would be quite memorable.
That said I’d like to see this happen. After all we all know political partt affiliation is meaningless these days. I wonder if people like Beck and Limbaugh will change their views on Obama if he does a switcher-roo. I would assume if this does happen it will be “on paper” top secret and not shown to the press.
The main reason why Americans SEEM apathetic is because the media keeps reporting bullshit fluff stories about meaningless crap.
Guyver the stooge: How can any party have “control” when the other party votes in a block and filibusters everything purely for political purposes?
Blame the Dems as if the Pukes are an alternative.
The entrenched political class is our enemy!!! Wake up Silly Hoomans.
VOTE ALL INCUMBENTS OUT OF OFFICE.
#16
that’s because it was revealed that his “Health care” plan is driving costs UP, not down as he “promised”
and he’s added more to the national debt in 19 months than all presidents- Washington through Reagan combined
http://cnsnews.com/news/article/72404
And I thought Marc Perkel made sure Dvorak gets no SPAM…
Ouch!
Here’s what will happen:
The Republicans will win in November, getting control of both the House and Senate – but not enough to over-ride a veto.
Then, the Republicans will spend an entire year trying to pass tax cuts for the rich. Obama will veto them.
The end result: By 2012 Obama will seem like a “reasonable” alternative to Republican nutbars and he will be re-elected.
2013: USA attacks Iran.
JMAN, the super stooge: you blather: “and he’s added more to the national debt in 19 months than all presidents- Washington through Reagan combined” /// And why stop at Raygun? Could it be because Clinton had a surplus and BushtheRetard also added more to the national debt in 8 year than all presidents- Washington through Reagan combined, and so BushtheRetards record can’t be added to the total?
Yes the stooges of the world will play with themselves/err-shit!!/no==with themselves and call it politics.
It is embarrassing to watch. Of course, the Dems and Pukes have differences: the difference between tax and spend to benefit the middle class, and deficit and spend to benefit the SUPER RICH, but other than that, they are pathetically the same and blaming one over the other is a stooges policy to keep the ball rolling that way.
VOTE ALL INCUMBENTS OUT OF OFFICE.
Maybe Obama will resign and run for mayor of Chicago, which was his life goal ten years ago.
It’s really too bad so many sheeple put their faith in parties. Not that it really matters really fixing the system crossed the point of no return a long time ago.
#25 right on
It’s the biggest F’up in the constitution to not have outlawed special interests groups from governing. The founding fathers were afraid of possible fractionating but didn’t address it in the constitution. Now we are stuck with parties.
It is R and D voters who are responsible for the mess we are in. Basic and simple logic. They are the bosses. There is no guarantee that a third party would be different, but we don’t know that. I say never vote for a D or R ever again until we know that it doesn’t matter who is in charge. This is basic and simple logic too.
18, Bobbo,
They got universal health care through didn’t they? In fact they shoved it through.
AGREED (as well as anyone who believes in redistributing wealth or taxing our way to prosperity).
19, JMan,
There’s no such thing as a free lunch.
and
22, Bobbo,
Obama’s stimulus plan cost more than the Iraq War: http://tinyurl.com/33xhefz
21, Chuck,
There’s no need to over-ride a veto when the only thing a Republican-controlled Congress needs to do with respect to health care is to not fund it (effectively eliminating the health care bill until a conservative / libertarian takes the White House).
The problem with voting out the incumbents is what do you get in return? Missouri has term limits, what it has managed to do is take a somewhat dysfunctional system and make it totally dysfunctional. Every one is so bent on their own self interest due to the short time in office nothing gets done. You end up in the same place gridlock.
Clancy–term limits is not the same thing as VOTE ALL INCUMBENTS OUT OF OFFICE, unless the term limit is “1.” And I will even accept that “at first” it may cause problems WORSE THAN the status quo==thats what happens when the revolution occurs. It is only a “hope” that doing the only thing we can do will eventually have an impact on what is now entirely impacted. CHANGE!!!!!! I doubt every state will have the same experience as any other state. Personalities and electorate are different.
My idea is full of holes. I welcome a discussion of any better alternative but there is nothing we as the sheep can do. Can’t change the constitution to have a parlimentary style of government. Can’t mandate public financing. Can’t overturn the Sup Ct saying money is speech or that corps are people too.
All we can do is: VOTE ALL INCUMBENTS OUT OF OFFICE.
#30–Pedrotito==you barf: “#2 You wanted him. You ate the “change” manure. Now, deal with it.” /// Nice combo there: all hostility without a clear idea at all. I never vote “for” a candidate because it is always obvious they are all corrupt packaged products and you can’t believe a thing they say. Even in hind sight though, Obama remains head and shoulders the better candidate than anything the Pukes could field then or now.
Was it a change from BushtheRetard?===of course.
Was it a change from the regurgitated vomit the Pukes had given us and were offering again?===of course.
Was it the change I wanted?===of course not. I am to the left of and right of Obama.
Poor Pedtotito==such a tool of the Pukes, you can’t perceive of politics except thru the lens of the two parties?????
Stupid Human.
#13 clever? No. clever people try to build up their base of support rather than tear it down with slanders and slurs made at the expense of others.
Of course if you actually believe what you said that is even less clever. None of the people I know that oppose Obama care about his race.
They care about jobs and they have observed that the only way Obama can think of to create jobs is to put people to work for the government.
They care about the fact that Obama and his Congressional supporters are the biggest wastrel spenders in the history of the nation. Wastrel because the return to the people on the money spent is ludicrous.
The 20% pay raise on average they gave Fed employees bought us what? Fed employees are making way more than none Fed employees for the same jobs.
That cap and trade is a huge energy tax designed to make some people rich while shafting the public.
That the biggest heath care reform package in history lacked tort reform, didn’t allow insurance to be sold across state lines, is going to make the cost of insurance go up for everybody who had insurance and is only by the wildest flights of the imagination economically sound.
The entire social safety net was heading for disaster before that bill was passed and the day of reckoning is now going to be a lot sooner.
Fanny May and Freddie Mac are still making bad loans.
He killed one Hades of lot of jobs down on the gulf.
I’m sure there are many other reasons for not liking what has been going on with Congress and Obama but those make my list.