For centuries, philosophers and scholars have argued and debated over the question – must there be a Jewish version of everything? Personally, I think the debate is entirely unnecessary. If you’ve ever endured a non-Jewish deli (with rye bread that looks like Wonder Bread with rye seeds glued on), experienced an Episcopalian attempting to play Tevye in “Fiddler On the Roof,” or met a married couple over 65 who did not reside in Florida – yes, there obviously needs to be a Jewish version of everything.

Now that Apple’s new iPad tablet has taken the computer world by storm, it was only a matter of time, then, before some enterprising Jewish tech-head created its Hebraic equivalent. Rejoice, fellow Jeeks (Jewish geeks)! That day has now arrived. Apple’s Israeli division, Orange, has just announced the introduction of its new Jewish tablet computer – the jPad, due for release this Summer.

No longer must we feel compelled to use the same tablet computer that every other Catholic, Protestant and Buddhist is using. We now have one that addresses the needs, lifestyle, background, and attributes of our Jewish community. And while it may not be Moses’s Twin Tablets, I think you’ll agree that it is absolutely Hebraic in every sense of the word.

Here’s an inside look at some of the jPad’s impressive features:

Have you ever wondered what Obama thinks of the iPad?


ABU DHABI (AFP) – There’s no mistaking what’s in this vending machine. The well-heeled in the Gulf can now grab gold to go from a hotel lobby in the United Arab Emirates, when the need for a quick ingot strikes.

On Thursday, a day after its inauguration, the shiny machine attracted spectators of many different nationalities who gathered to watch whenever an enthusiast was struck with the urge to splurge on a bar of the precious metal.

Abu Dhabi’s Emirates Palace Hotel became the first place outside Germany to install “gold to go, the world’s first gold vending machine,” said a statement from Ex Oriente Lux AG, the German company behind the vending machine. “In addition to one-gram, five-gram and 10-gram bars of gold, the machine also dispenses gold coins,” it added. Gold rates are constantly updated inside the shiny machine — itself gold-plated — in the hotel’s lobby, courtesy of a built-in computer connected to a dealer which sells gold online.

“This eliminates the risk premiums usually associated with precious metal trading,” the German company said. Hotel general manager Hans Olbertz said they wanted the hotel to be the first in the world to offer guests what he called “this golden service.”

So, I wonder if it will buy gold from you as well.



Researchers at the University of Washington and University of California-San Diego have examined the multitudinous computer systems that run modern cars, discovering that they’re easily broken into with alarming results. Hackers can disable the brakes of moving vehicles, lock the key in the ignition to prevent the engine from being turned off, jam all the door locks, and make the engine run faster. Less dangerously, they can control the radio, heating, and air conditioning, or just endlessly honk the horn.

Their attacks used physical access to the federally mandated On-Board Diagnostics (OBD-II) port, typically located under the dashboard. This provided access to another piece of federally mandated equipment, the Controller Area Network (CAN) bus. With this access, they could control the various Electronic Control Units (ECUs) located throughout the vehicle, with scant few restrictions.

Found by Micah Phillips who adds: “I can just picture the future: The government giving a ‘terrorist’s’ plug-in hybrid a virus, driving their cars into oncoming traffic, then wiping away any digital fingerprints.”



Some government-run unemployment offices in Britain offer teenage job seekers a chance to make more than $1,000 a week on X-rated websites, the Birmingham Mail reports.

The newspaper says the “job with a difference” is being advertised at Jobcentre Plus offices in Birmingham, Warwickshire and Shropshire by an adult recruiting agency, Faceclick.

The agency encourages applicants to engage in sexually explicit conversations with customers and to perform “activities that you feel comfortable with” when naked in front of a camera, the newspaper says. The Mail reports that one 19 -year-old girl was handed application details when she showed up a JobCentre Plus office looking for clerical work.

A spokesman for The Department for Work and Pensions in West Midlands tells The Mail that the unemployment office is required to advertise a vacancy if it is legal. The newspaper says Jobcentre Plus lost a legal battle seven years ago when it tried to refuse advertising jobs in the adult entertainment industry.

No longer do you need to get out of bed to go to work, just turn the iMac on and clock in…what could be better? Jobs, Jobs, Jobs!






 

This Episode’s Executive Producers: Matthew Greensmith, Adam Miller
PR Associate: Pat Wilson and Weezer!!! On George Lopez Monday Night
Artwork by: Sir Paul T.
Knighthood: Sir Adam Miller
Knights Noir: Sir Aaron Jones, Sir Phlip Evans, Sir Roland Ruth, Sir Kelly Spongberg, Dame Maragret George, Sir Todd Symmons
Special Thanks to NerdyDude for saving us with the stream recording!

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LAST EPISODE BEFORE THE 200th Show. Celebrate with us with a Deuce Club Membership here.


  • EU tells Facebook to jump.
  • Office Mobile 2010 upgrade is free.
  • Lizards threatened by global warming.
  • April video game sales down 26-percent.
  • HTC suing everyone.
  • Limewire found guilty!
  • iPhone in Viet Nam story continues.
  • Congress is on Facebook. Why?
  • Android 2.2 is better!
  • MSN launches mobile homepage designer.
  • Android tablet coming out soon.
  • LED lighting coming out shortly.
  • Walmart in bed with Apple.

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The alleged incident happened just after TAKS testing two weeks ago. Isaiah Johnson said it all started as he and other classmates watched and laughed as a mentally challenged girl danced. That’s when he says the teacher attacked the 13-year-old. Isaiah said he was beaten by the teacher, with other teachers looking on, right there in the classroom.

“The teachers piled up and they were looking over each others shoulders just watching,” Isaiah said.

David Jones, the principal of the school, released a statement later in the day. “There is no excuse for a teacher to behave in this way with a child,” Jones said. “Although we had already removed the teacher from the classroom and put her on administrative duty, we now plan to terminate the teacher and make an apology to the student and his mother.”

Jones said the school will be investigating whether other teachers saw the incident and did not report it.

Wow, I haven’t seen anything like that since my Catholic School days. The other kids seemed to be having fun with it, however. The teacher will be looking for other employment, I might suggest the UFC.


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Today’s Guests:
Sebastian Rupley, Co-Crank
Chris DiBona, Open Source Program Manager, Google
Dan Goodin, Reporter, The Register

The Topics:
Is Apple Building Its Own Flash?
University Snubs Gmail Over Privacy Concerns
Can You Really Trust Facebook?
Will the iPad Take Down the Kindle?
The Porn Domain Debate Returns

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Huh, what a shocker!


ODESSA, Texas – A lot of guys dream about going back to high school and recapturing their athletic glory days. A man who went by the name of Jerry Joseph did it, police say, and now he’s in big trouble.

Authorities say the boyish-looking 22-year-old posed as a 16-year-old sophomore phenom to lead the Permian High School basketball team to the state playoffs. He was jailed on fraud charges, and the rabidly competitive West Texas high school that inspired the movie “Friday Night Lights” may have to forfeit its season.

“Everyone just thought he was a big guy,” said Permian senior football player Steven Pipes. “He played the part good, skipping down the hallways acting goofy like a 16-year-old.” Joseph was a starter and played center and forward. But suspicions about the player’s identity first arose when three Florida basketball coaches familiar with a former player named Guerdwich Montimere recognized him last month at an amateur tournament in Little Rock, Ark. Montimere, a naturalized U.S. citizen from Haiti, graduated from Dillard High School in Fort Lauderdale in 2007.

School officials and immigration authorities initially believed Joseph when he denied the allegations and let him remain enrolled. But school police and immigration agents confirmed Montimere’s identity Tuesday. When confronted, he confessed, said school district spokesman Mike Adkins.

I’m assuming schools don’t check birth certificates for enrollment anymore?


The Daily Beast examined a wide range of available data to rank the level of corruption in all 50 states. Each of the following data sets was weighted equally:

•Public corruption, 1998—2008: Convictions of elected and other public officials investigated by federal agents over an 11-year period, from the Department of Justice.

•Racketeering and Extortion, 1998—2008: Code for organized crime convictions, also investigated by federal agents over an 11-year period, from the Bureau of Justice Statistics.

•Forgery and Counterfeiting, 1999—2008: Arrest numbers for producing or distributing fake money and goods over a 10-year period, from the FBI.

•Fraud, 1999—2008: Arrests for false statements or documents produced for personal gain over a 10-year period, from the FBI.

•Embezzlement, 1999—2008: Arrests for surreptitious theft of money over a 10-year period, from the FBI.

By using a decade’s worth of federal data, we were able to minimize changes in local law enforcement efficacy, though some flaws remain: local cases go undocumented, and the FBI data is self-reported by local law enforcement. When combined, however, the data provides a fairly deep look into which jurisdictions are uncovering the most corruption. We leveled the playing field by calculating the numbers on a per-100,000 people basis.

So, uh, how did your state do?


What gets me about all this is that everyone rationalizes this BS as OK. The ends “cap and trade” justify the means “convincing people about global warming.”

As James Delingpole reveals, that polar bear image is fake. It’s been Photoshopped. Science subsequently admitted:

“The image associated with this article was selected by the editors. We did not realize that it was not an original photograph but a collage, and it was a mistake to have used it.”

Found by Jason Price.



Click pic to embiggen & enlighten with additional info


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