Dvorak News Blog

No Agenda Show
Zero Risk Society

By John C Dvorak Monday July 8, 2013

Executive Producers: Sir David R. Foley Black Baron of Silicon Valley, Sir Eric of Minnasotnuts, Sir Mark Dytham Baron of Tokyo, Sir John Richert, Baron Sir Dr. Sharkey Protector of the Smokey Mountains, Ron Zoetjens
Associate Executive Producers: Bubba Moustafa, Michael Knight, John Sextro, Keith Brown, Dame Astrid Viscountess of Tokyo
Art By: Patrick Buijs

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Warm and Sunny with a 90 Per Cent Chance of Eye-Rolling

By McCullough Monday July 8, 2013

20 Comments

Insert blond jokes below.

Case Reopened on Madeline McCann

By McCullough Sunday July 7, 2013

63 Comments

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London (CNN) — UK officers have identified 38 “people of interest” in connection with the disappearance six years ago in Portugal of British toddler Madeleine McCann, the Metropolitan Police said Thursday.

McCann disappeared while her family was on vacation on the Algarve coast in 2007. She was a few days shy of her 4th birthday at the time she vanished from the family’s holiday apartment in Praia da Luz.

UK officers who have spent two years reviewing the initial investigations into her disappearance have found “new findings and new witness evidence,” a police statement said. “Our review has now progressed to a position where we have identified 38 persons of interest.”

Twelve of those are UK nationals who the police believe were in Portugal at the time the girl went missing.

All the others are European nationals. Metropolitan Police officers are talking to authorities in other countries to get more information about them and their potential involvement, the statement said.

“We continue to believe that there is a possibility that Madeleine is alive,” said Detective Chief Inspector Andy Redwood, who heads the team.

If police had spent as much time and energy pursuing the pedophile theory as they did blaming the parents, there’s a good possibility they would have uncovered a ring and saved not only this kid but many others as well. But I guess there were just too many powerful people involved to spark their interest.

I posted this back in 2008.

Student to NSA Recruiter: Is being a good liar a qualification for getting an NSA job?

By Uncle Dave Saturday July 6, 2013

91 Comments

On Tuesday, the National Security Agency called at the University of Wisconsin on a recruitment drive.

Attending the session was Madiha R Tahir, a journalist studying a language course at the university. She asked the squirming recruiters a few uncomfortable questions about the activities of NSA: which countries the agency considers to be “adversaries”, and if being a good liar is a qualification for getting a job at the NSA.

She has posted a recording of the session on Soundcloud, which you can hear above, and posted a rough transcript on her blog, The Mob and the Multitude.

Make sure the read or listen to the whole exchange. It’s a hoot!

Kids Who Play Guitar. Must Be Easy if they Can Do it.

By John C Dvorak Saturday July 6, 2013

27 Comments

If you have children and they are moaning about music lessons show them these clips and say, “Look, how easy it is for these kids. You are not trying hard enough!”

A 13 year old girl warming up

15 year old blowing away Sammy Hagar

Here is an 11 year old boy

But even a six year old can play.

Here is s slew of toddlers playing guitar

By the time your child is 15 he or she should be doing this.

And if the guitar is not your thing. Here is what a 3-year old can do on drums.

I’m hearing voices in my head and they don’t like you very much….

By McCullough Saturday July 6, 2013

16 Comments

Sky Deutschland has developed technology to transfer adverts from train windows directly and silently into commuters’ heads. Passengers leaning their head against the window will “hear” adverts “coming from inside the user’s head”, urging them to download the Sky Go app.

The proposal involves using bone conduction technology, which is used in hearing aids, headphones and Google’s Glass headset, to pass sound to the inner ear via vibrations through the skull.

A video for the Talking Window campaign released by Sky Deutschland and ad agency BBDO Germany states: “Tired commuters often rest their heads against windows. Suddenly a voice inside their head is talking to them. No one else can hear this message.”

The voice comes from a Sky-branded transmitter made by Audiva that is attached to the train window.

BBDO spokesman Ulf Brychcy told the BBC: “If our customer Sky Deutschland agrees, we will start with the new medium as quickly as possible.

It won’t be long now.

Unemployment. So You Know.

By John C Dvorak Friday July 5, 2013

75 Comments

Just so you do not get too cocky regarding the improved unemployment numbers. The REAL numbers are still going the wrong way!!

Should Edward Snowden Marry Russian Spy Anna Chapman?

By Marc Perkel Friday July 5, 2013

43 Comments

Russian spy and former CIA officer Anna Chapman announced her intention to link her fate with whistleblower of U.S. intelligence secrets, Edward Snowden.

Chapman, as well as a number of other agents were caught in the United States in 2010. Now is the time when the woman found the man whom she thinks she could open her heart to.

He is Edward Snowden, a former CIA officer, who found a temporary home at Sheremetyevo Airport in Moscow. It may be really hard for Snowden to find a country where he could be safe now, but finding a girlfriend and then a wife appears to be an easy nut to crack for him.

Chapman tweeted her proposal to Snowden, asking him whether he could marry her.

Most likely, though, the Russian spy will have to travel abroad in an attempt to conquer the heart of the courageous American man.

No Agenda Show
Odious Selfies

By John C Dvorak Thursday July 4, 2013

3 Comments

Executive Producers: David Bruneff, Big Ass Blond, Ron Schutjens, Dame Francine Hardaway, Dame Janice Kang, Francis & Nancy Mclure, Sir Random Hillbilly, Steven Fettig
Associate Executive Producers: Francis Lambert, Jerry Zak, Colin Sloman

Double Producers Credits: Garry Whitehead, Michael Slisinger, Luke From Munich, Sir Dr. Sharkey, James Crossett, Chris Heffley. Symbio Agency, Michael Levin, Daniel Miller, Sir Dwayne Melancon Earl of Oregon, David Foley (Black Baron of Silicon Valley), Hendrick Smit, Dame Francine Hardaway, Baronetess Janice Kang, Ryan Bemrose, Robert Hegedus, Nicolas Roth, Anonymous, Robert Tennent, Kevin LaCombe, Tobiah Marks, Karen Edwards, Brian Ferguson, Roy Pingel, Brian Newman,Wesley Young

Art By: Dennis Cruise

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Yep, Your Snail Mail Too

By Uncle Dave Wednesday July 3, 2013

109 Comments

Again, shouldn’t be a surprise.

Mr. Pickering was targeted by a longtime surveillance system called mail covers, a forerunner of a vastly more expansive effort, the Mail Isolation Control and Tracking program, in which Postal Service computers photograph the exterior of every piece of paper mail that is processed in the United States — about 160 billion pieces last year. It is not known how long the government saves the images.

Together, the two programs show that postal mail is subject to the same kind of scrutiny that the National Security Agency has given to telephone calls and e-mail.

And here’s one reason why this and electronic snooping is all a problem:

The program has led to sporadic reports of abuse. In May 2012, Mary Rose Wilcox, a Maricopa County supervisor in Arizona, was awarded nearly $1 million by a federal judge after winning a lawsuit against Sheriff Joe Arpaio. The sheriff, known for his immigration raids, had obtained mail covers from the Postal Service to track her mail. The judge called the investigation into Ms. Wilcox politically motivated because she had been a frequent critic of Mr. Arpaio’s, objecting to what she considered the targeting of Hispanics in his immigration sweeps.

Snowden seeks asylum in place immune from US prosecution – WALL STREET

By Marc Perkel Wednesday July 3, 2013

28 Comments

In a desperate bid to evade the international reach of US authorities Snowden has applies for asylum to Wall Street. “Where else can I go?”, says Snowden. Pointing out that Wall Street ripped off 10 trillion dollars in 2008 and no one went to jail Snowden thinks this is the only place on Earth that is beyond the reach of the Justice Department. “If they can get away with that,” says Snowden, this must be the best place in the world to hide!”

Obama Got A Nobel Peace Prize, Why Shouldn’t This Guy Get One, Too?

By Uncle Dave Wednesday July 3, 2013

18 Comments

Former Chicago Bull’s basketball player Dennis Rodman thinks he should be in the running for a Nobel Peace Prize following his meeting with North Korean leader Kim Jong Un earlier this year.

In Sports Illustrated’s annual “Where Are They Now” issue, the hall of famer applauds Kim Jong Un for what could be called restraint on behalf of the reclusive leader. “Fact is, he hasn’t bombed anywhere he’s threatened to yet. Not South Korea, not Hawaii, not … whatever,” Rodman said.
[…]
“All I know is Kim told me he doesn’t want to go to war with America. His whole deal is to talk basketball with Obama,” Rodman is quoted as saying in Sports Illustrated. “Unfortunately, Obama doesn’t want to have anything to do with him. I ask, Mr. President, what’s the harm in a simple phone call? This is a new age, man. Come on, Obama, reach out to Kim and be his friend.”

Spoken like a true statesman.

WOW! Obama just kidnapped the President of Bolivia!!!

By Marc Perkel Tuesday July 2, 2013

58 Comments

I guess the good news is that they don’t hate us for our freedom anymore.

Austrian plane search for leaker Snowden enrages Bolivia

Whackiest crook of the Day

By Eideard Tuesday July 2, 2013

34 Comments

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Las Cruces Crime Stoppers is offering a $1,000 reward for information that helps identify the suspect who stole cash from a Check “N Go store Saturday morning…The robbery occurred at around 9:15 a.m…at the Check “N Go at 400 N. Telshor Blvd, according to a Las Cruces Police new release.

Nancy Pelosi – The Goddess of Blissful Ignorance

By Marc Perkel Monday July 1, 2013

50 Comments

It reminds me of the movie “The Matrix” where you have a choice between the red pill and the blue pill. If you take the red pill you see reality as it really is. If you take the blue pill you remain in blissful ignorance.

The NSA is here to protect you. It’s a balance between liberty and safety. I want you to believe me what I tell you that we lie to you for your own protection. And even though I don’t know what is going on myself and I’m too stupid to understand it if I did I can assure you that there is congressional oversight. So take the blue pill and remain in blissful ignorance.

Thus say Nancy Pelosi – the Goddess of Blissful Ignorance.